Planning for Yourself While Caring for Someone with a Disability

Most of us have been on a plane and heard the preflight safety instructions that include some version of the oxygen mask principle: Secure your own mask before assisting others.

Why do they emphasize this point? Because you cannot effectively help someone else if you are struggling to breathe.

Millions of Americans may not realize that this situation is analogous to their role as a caregiver. When you prioritize caring for somebody else, your own health, finances, and planning may suffer. Over time, these stressors can lead to burnout. Emotionally and financially, you run out of air; it feels like you are suffocating under the caregiving burden.

Applied to caregiving, the oxygen mask principle is a reminder that getting your own affairs in order is not selfish but essential. Caring for yourself and planning for your future helps ensure that you can continue to care for a loved one over the long term.

The Caregiver Crisis in America

With baby boomers entering retirement in record numbers and most wanting to age in place in their homes, demand for long-term care at home is rapidly rising. Yet the supply of professional caregivers has not kept pace, leaving many families without reliable support and placing growing pressure on informal, unpaid family caregivers. This gap has contributed to America’s caregiver crisis.1

Approximately one in four US adults, or 60 million Americans, serve as unpaid family caregivers for loved ones in the home, an increase of almost 50 percent since 2015.2

These caregivers provide hundreds of billions of dollars worth of essential services every year, often with little or no training, institutional support, or financial assistance. Many are simultaneously working full time and raising children while managing the daily needs of aging parents or disabled loved ones.

Caregiving responsibilities can quietly push personal goals aside, including retirement planning, career advancement, and future financial security. It also takes place, often unheard and unseen, behind closed doors and largely outside the formal healthcare system. But the value of unpaid caregiving—estimated at roughly $1.1 trillion annually3—exceeds all out-of-pocket healthcare spending in the United States.

Here are some additional figures that put the family caregiver crisis in perspective:

  • The average amount of time spent in an informal caregiver role is 24 hours per week,4 but nearly one-quarter of caregivers provide more than 40 hours of care per week.5
  • Caregivers spend an average of 26 percent of their income on caregiving activities.6
  • Nearly half of caregivers report having out-of-pocket financial impacts due to caregiving responsibilities: 28 percent stopped saving; 23 percent took on more debt; 22 percent used up short-term savings; and 19 percent left bills unpaid or paid them late.7
  • Caregivers’ average lost wages and benefits over a lifetime are $324,000 for women and $284,000 for men.8
  • One in five caregivers reports poor health; one in four struggles to care for their own health because of caregiving duties;9 and the same number report feeling socially isolated.10
  • Most caregivers (nearly 70 percent) report difficulty balancing professional obligations and caregiving responsibilities; many are forced to make career sacrifices, including reduced hours, missed promotions, leaves of absence, early retirement, or exiting the workforce altogether.11 Those who leave the workforce and come back after caregiving are often paid less with fewer benefits.

How Caregivers Can Care for Themselves

Caregiving tends to begin modestly, with occasional voluntary tasks that may gradually increase in frequency, complexity, and emotional weight. Caregiver burnout and financial strain can likewise progress incrementally and quietly.

But even when caregiver stress is evident, it often goes unacknowledged. Only 13 percent of caregivers say that anyone has ever asked what support they need.12

Caregivers frequently feel isolated. They say they need more support. The question is: Where does it come from?

The obvious but overlooked answer may be themselves, with assistance from their trusted advisors or other professionals.

Caregiver burnout may escalate to a situation where a mental health clinician is needed.13 But before caregiving reaches a personal crisis level, additional resources and structured planning can help ease a caregiver’s burden and give an oxygen boost that lets them think more clearly.

Balancing Your Role as a Caregiver and a Planner

  • Navigating day-to-day caregiving demands. Simplifying and organizing financial and administrative tasks can reduce decision fatigue and free up time and energy for caregiving.
  • Designating successor caregivers. Identifying who would step in if you were temporarily or permanently unable to provide care helps protect your loved one and reduces uncertainty during emergencies.
  • Establishing powers of attorney for your own finances and healthcare. Naming trusted decision-makers ensures that your wishes are honored and prevents disruptions if you are unable to act on your own behalf.

Planning Ahead to Reduce Emotional and Financial Burnout

  • Automating finances and simplifying administration. Automating bill payments, savings, and recurring tasks keeps financial continuity intact when caregiving limits your time and attention.
  • Building an emergency fund for personal needs. Caregivers may be forced to put others’ needs first. An accessible reserve can cover unexpected personal expenses without adding stress or debt.
  • Protecting your own retirement savings and investments. Supporting a loved one today should not permanently undermine your security tomorrow. Planning can help balance present caregiving costs with long-term financial stability.

Other resources that caregivers may find useful can be found through the Family Caregiver Alliance,14 the Caregiver Action Network,15 the Zen Caregiving Project,16 and the Administration for Community Living.17

You may also want to explore Medicaid and Veterans Affairs programs that pay family caregivers.18 In addition, caregiving technology and apps can assist caregivers with tasks such as medication reminders, activity logging, managing appointments, and coordinating a team of caregivers.19 

Do Not Let Caregiving Crowd Out Your Own Planning

Managing someone else’s care can lead to you neglecting your own legal and financial planning. But planning for yourself is part of planning for others. Only after you catch your breath will you have the energy to help someone else.

As a planning principle, we have our masks at the ready so that we can care for the caregivers and ensure that everyone involved makes it through the turbulence.


  1. What Is the Caregiver Crisis? Johns Hopkins (July 28, 2025), https://publichealth.jhu.edu/2025/what-is-the-caregiver-crisis. ↩︎
  2. AARP, Caregiving in the US: Research Report 7 (July 2025), https://www.aarp.org/content/dam/aarp/ppi/topics/ltss/family-caregiving/caregiving-in-us-2025.doi.10.26419-2fppi.00373.001.pdf. ↩︎
  3. Katherine Gallagher Robbins & Jessica Mason, If Americans Were Paid for Their Caregiving, They Would Make More Than $1.1 Trillion, nationalpartnership, (June 26, 2025), https://nationalpartnership.org/if-americans-were-paid-for-their-caregiving-they-would-make-more-than-1-1-trillion. ↩︎
  4. Shawn Britt, Home Health Care and the Caregiver Crisis in America, Nationwide, https://www.nationwide.com/financial-professionals/topics/health-care-cost-longevity/pages/caregiver-crisis-in-america  (last visited Feb. 25, 2026). ↩︎
  5. New Report Reveals Crisis Point for America’s 63 Million Family Caregivers, AARP (Aug. 1, 2025), https://states.aarp.org/maryland/caregiving-report. ↩︎
  6. Laura Skufca & Gerard Rainville, Caregiving Can Be Costly—Even Financially, AARP (June 29, 2021), https://www.aarp.org/pri/topics/ltss/family-caregiving/family-caregivers-cost-survey. ↩︎
  7. AARP, Caregiving in the US, supra note 17, at 43. ↩︎
  8. MetLife, The MetLife Study of Caregiving Costs to Working Caregivers: Double Jeopardy for Baby Boomers Caring for Their Parents 4 (June 2011), https://www.homecaregenerations.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/study.pdf. ↩︎
  9. AARP, Caregiving in the US, supra note 17, at 55. ↩︎
  10. Id. at 9. ↩︎
  11. New U.S. Workforce Report: Nearly 70% of Family Caregivers Report Difficulty Balancing Career and Caregiving Responsibilities, Spurring Long-Term Impacts to U.S. Economy, AARP (May 16, 2024), https://www.aarp.org/press/releases/2024-5-16-us-workforce-report-70-caregivers-difficulty-balancing-career-caregiving-responsibilities.html. ↩︎
  12. AARP, Caregiving in the US, supra note 17, at 15. ↩︎
  13. Id. ↩︎
  14. Family Caregiver Services by State, Fam. Caregiver All., http://caregiver.org/connecting-caregivers/services-by-state (last visited Feb. 26, 2026). ↩︎
  15. The Family Caregiver Toolbox, Caregiver Action Network, https://www.caregiveraction.org/toolbox (last visited Feb. 26, 2026). ↩︎
  16. Better Caregiving Through Mindfulness, Zen Caregiving Project, https://zencaregiving.org/for-caregivers (last visited Feb. 26, 2026). ↩︎
  17. Caregiving and Direct Care Workforce, ACL (Feb. 4, 2026), https://acl.gov/programs/support-caregivers. ↩︎
  18. Julie B. Kennedy, Five Ways Family Caregivers Can Get Paid, NCOA (Jan. 8, 2025), https://www.ncoa.org/article/five-ways-family-caregivers-can-get-paid. ↩︎
  19. Rachel Lustbader, The Best Caregiving Apps of 2024: 6 Apps to Help You Through Common Caregiving Challenges, Caring (Feb. 11, 2026), https://www.caring.com/resources/best-caregiving-apps. ↩︎

The Overlooked Risk in Every Estate Plan: Disability

Disability is often treated as a remote possibility, something that happens to other people. Yet one of the most persistent blind spots in planning conversations is disability risk. Disability is not limited to conditions that we are born with. It can arise for anyone, at any age, across income levels, and in virtually any circumstance. Comprehensive estate planning is not solely focused around death; it is also about preserving autonomy during life, including through any period of disability.

That is why an estate plan that overlooks disability altogether ignores one of life’s most consequential what-ifs and risks falling short if a health crisis strikes.

The Ever-Present Risk of Disability

For many people, death may feel like something that reliably arrives at the end of old age, not as an imminent or unpredictable risk. The COVID-19 pandemic brought heightened awareness of illness and mortality to people of all ages and triggered a surge in estate planning as millions took steps to protect their loved ones and their futures.

Most Americans dramatically underestimate both the very real risk and significant financial consequences of disability.

  • Approximately 1 in 4 20-year-oldswill experience a disability lasting 90 days or more before reaching age 67.1
  • About 13 percent of Americans are classified as disabled,2 yet two-thirds of workers believe their own risk of long-term disability is just 1 or 2 percent.3
  • More than half of Americans turning 65 will develop a disability serious enough to require long-term services and supports.4
  • Illness, not accidents, is the leading cause of disability, and mental health conditions account for roughly 1 in 10 long-term disability cases.5
  • Households with a working-age disabled adult need 28 percent more income on average, or an extra $17,000–$18,000 annually, to maintain the same standard of living due to higher expenses for healthcare, equipment, personal care, housing, and lost earnings.6

Although many disabilities are temporary, a significant share are not. About 1 in 5 adults (22 percent) will have a disability for more than five years.7 The longer somebody is disabled, the more it impacts their finances. Estimates suggest that a 35-year-old earning $75,000 who suffers a permanent disability could lose up to $2.25 million in potential earnings by age 65, and a disability beginning at age 45 could result in more than $1 million in lost lifetime income.8

Making Planning Decisions Before Disability Strikes

Because incapacity can strike without warning, you need to have incapacity planning in place beforeit becomes necessary, not after. Many planning decisions require legal capacity (the cognitive ability to make decisions) to create them, and if documents are executed after capacity is lost, they are likely to be challenged or invalidated.

Delaying planning can also have severe financial consequences because it may necessitate additional costly legal procedures at a time when care expenses may be rapidly mounting while income and savings decline. For many households, even a short disruption can be destabilizing.

  • Roughly three-quarters of Americans live from paycheck to paycheck, leaving little margin to absorb the financial shock of disability, particularly a prolonged one.9
  • Nearly 4 in 10 cannot cover an unexpected $500 expense, let alone sustained increases in healthcare, housing, or caregiving costs.10
  • Approximately 50 million adults lack disability insurance beyond Social Security,11 and the average monthly Social Security benefit for a disabled worker is under $2,000 per month.12
  • Since most Americans have no estate plan, they lack powers of attorney and other critical disability and incapacity planning documents, forcing loved ones to pursue costly legal proceedings to get authority to access finances or make care decisions. 

If any of these concerns hit uncomfortably close to home, you may benefit from adding disability protections to your estate plan to increase your financial resilience.

Here are some options to discuss with an attorney:

  • Financial power of attorney. Allows someone you trust to manage bills, accounts, and financial decisions if you are unable to do so yourself, helping prevent missed payments, account freezes, or court involvement
  • Healthcare planning (such as advance directives and living wills). Allows you to document your medical preferences in advance and name someone to make healthcare decisions on your behalf if you cannot communicate them yourself
  • Advance planning for special needs trusts. Can be planned for in advance either to support a loved one who is already disabled or to serve as a safeguard if disability arises later, helping preserve government benefits while providing additional financial support
  • Letters of intent. While not legally binding, such letters explain your wishes, routines, preferences, and priorities in plain language, providing critical guidance to caregivers, trustees, and family members during unexpected transitions
  • Coordinated estate planning for income disruption and care costs. Works best when paired with broader financial planning that anticipates the potentially destabilizing combination of lower income and higher healthcare costs

Because disability risks and their consequences can shift with age and change over time, disability-specific planning measures should be revisited regularly, along with the rest of your plan.

Disability planning is not alarmist, worst-case thinking. It is realistic, personal preparation for a possibility that may be difficult to face but, sadly, is far more common than most people expect.


  1. Soc. Sec. Admin., Disability Benefits, Pub. No. 05-10029, at  5 (Feb. 2025) https://www.ssa.gov/pubs/EN-05-10029.pdf. ↩︎
  2. Rebecca Leppert & Katherine Schaeffer, 8 Facts About Americans with Disabilities, Pew Rsch. Ctr. (July 24, 2023), https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/07/24/8-facts-about-americans-with-disabilities. ↩︎
  3. Allan Checkoway, Chance of Becoming Disabled, in A Lawyer’s Guide to Filing Long-Term Disability Claims and Appeals 1, 2 (2020), https://www.americanbar.org/content/dam/aba-cms-dotorg/products/inv/book/346779304/Sample.pdf. ↩︎
  4. HHS Off. of the Assistant Sec’y for Plan. and Evaluation, Research Brief: Long-Term Services and Supports for Older Americans: Risks and Financing, 2022, at 1 (Aug. 2022), https://aspe.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/documents/08b8b7825f7bc12d2c79261fd7641c88/ltss-risks-financing-2022.pdf [hereinafter ASPE Research Brief]. ↩︎
  5. Uncomfortable Truths About Disability That May Surprise You, MassMutual 175 (Sept. 15, 2023), https://blog.massmutual.com/insurance/disability-surprising-facts. ↩︎
  6. The Extra Costs of Living with a Disability in the U.S. — Resetting the Policy Table, ndi, https://www.nationaldisabilityinstitute.org/reports/extra-costs-living-with-disability, (last visited Feb. 25, 2026). ↩︎
  7. ASPE Research Brief, supra note 7, at 1. ↩︎
  8. Uncomfortable Truths About Disability That May Surprise You, supra note 8. ↩︎
  9. Number of Americans Living Paycheck to Paycheck Has Increased, PR Newswire (Sept. 14, 2022), https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/number-of-americans-living-paycheck-to-paycheck-has-increased-301624801.html. ↩︎
  10. Fed. Rsrv. Bd., Economic Well-Being of U.S. Households in 2023, at 37 (May 2024), https://www.federalreserve.gov/publications/files/2023-report-economic-well-being-us-households-202405.pdf. ↩︎
  11. Illness or Injury—and the Accompanying Financial Challenges—Can Happen to Anyone, CDIA, https://thecdia.org/the-risk-is-very-real (last visited Feb. 25, 2026). ↩︎
  12. Social Security Disability Benefits Calculator, Disability Advice, https://disabilityadvice.org/ssdi-calculator (last visited Feb. 25, 2026). ↩︎

Protecting Those You Love:Estate Planning When a Family Member Has a Disability

Many famous figures have argued that how a society treats its most vulnerable members is a measure of its humanity and moral character. As Mahatma Gandhi famously observed, a society is ultimately judged not by its wealth or power but by how it uplifts those who need help the most.

Government programs such as Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid support the needs of millions of disabled Americans. However, many of the day-to-day responsibilities and costs of caring for an individual with special needs fall on families, who are often left to navigate complex rules while trying to do the right thing for someone they love.

For families with disabled loved ones, estate planning must address proactive, coordinated decisions that protect benefits, support quality of life, and consider long-term financial planning alongside long-term care needs.

The Public Benefits Versus Private Wealth Conundrum in Special Needs Planning

The term disability paradox refers to a well-documented pattern in which many people living with serious disabilities report a high quality of life and strong life satisfaction even when they face substantial limitations shaped by healthcare gaps, social stigma, daily restrictions, and inadequate support systems.1 Outside observers often interpret these same circumstances as inherently undesirable and assume that disability and the struggles these individuals face must correspond to reduced well-being and overall satisfaction with life.

A related paradox shows up in how our system supports people with disabilities. Public programs that are designed to provide critical assistance such as income support, housing assistance, medical care, and long-term support are typically available only if an individual has very limited financial resources of their own. Qualifying for these benefits therefore requires severe financial constraints, even when family members want to provide financial assistance. Access to essential support, in other words, often depends on maintaining what can feel like voluntary poverty layered on top of an existing disability.

Programs such as Supplemental Security Income (SSI) and Medicaid generally require individuals to have limited income and assets—often no more than $2,000 in countable resources.

At the same time, families caring for a child with a disability face nearly double the risk of financial hardship compared with families with nondisabled children.2 Research shows that these families are more likely to rely on a single income, work lower-paying or less flexible jobs, live in poorer-quality housing, and experience long-term financial strain.3 And yet, the help that family members try to provide is still closely scrutinized. Giving money directly to a disabled loved one—or leaving assets to them outright through an estate plan—can unintentionally cause them to lose the very benefits they depend on.

This is the challenge at the heart of special needs planning: how to provide necessary support without putting essential benefits at risk.

Special Needs Trusts and Other Disability Benefit Work-arounds

Because leaving money directly to a disabled loved one can jeopardize their public benefits, families need a way to provide financial support that promotes stability and protects eligibility.

One common approach is a special (or supplemental) needs trust (SNT). SNTs hold funds for a disabled beneficiary and allow money to be used for approved expenses that improve quality of life but do not affect eligibility for programs such as SSI or Medicaid. These trusts are designed to supplement public benefits, not replace them.

SNTs are central to disability planning but are not the only option families may consider. The following planning tools can play a supporting role:

  • ABLE accounts. Achieving a Better Life Experience (ABLE) accounts allow eligible individuals with disabilities to save a limited amount of money each year for qualified expenses such as housing, education, transportation, and healthcare while keeping public benefits intact. These accounts can offer flexibility for smaller day-to-day needs.
  • Pooled trusts. Pooled trusts are sometimes used when creating a standalone SNT is impractical. Funds are pooled for investment purposes but tracked separately for each beneficiary and are professionally managed, reducing any administrative burden on the individual and their loved ones.
  • Life insurance. A life insurance policy can be used to fund future care needs, particularly for parents or caregivers who want to ensure that resources will be available for their disabled loved one after they are gone. In many cases, insurance proceeds are directed into a trust rather than paid outright to avoid jeopardizing any needs-based benefits the disabled individual currently relies on.

The right approach often involves a combination of tools, carefully coordinated to reflect a family’s resources, goals, and the specific needs of the disabled individual.

The size of the support matters, but so does how it is structured. Each approach should be judged not only individually but collectively, based on how it fits into the bigger planning picture.

Matching People with Plans

The right planning strategies can empower disabled individuals to live more independently and securely, often with a higher quality of life. But a plan is only as strong as the people designated to carry it out. Guardians, caregivers, and trustees play a pivotal role in maintaining continuity of care within a special needs estate plan.

Naming Guardians, Caregivers, and Trustees

A strong plan does not rely on a single person to do everything. It clearly defines roles so that responsibilities are shared, understood, and sustainable over time. In most plans benefiting people with special needs, that means thoughtfully naming and coordinating the following individuals:

  • Guardians or primary caregivers. These are the people responsible for day-to-day care and major personal decisions. They ensure that the individual’s living situation, healthcare, routines, and personal needs are met consistently and compassionately.
  • Trustees or financial decision-makers. Trustees manage funds set aside for the disabled individual. They make decisions about when and how money is used to support quality of life while also preserving eligibility for public benefits. Their role is financial oversight, not daily caregiving.
  • Advocates or backup decision-makers. In some families, a trusted person serves as an extra set of eyes. This person understands the plan, the benefits rules, and the individual’s preferences and can step in if needed.

In addition to these key individuals, the plan may require support from outside professionals such as life care planners, social workers, financial advisors, and a corporate or professional trustee to serve as either the primary or backup fiduciary.

Clearly separating these roles helps avoid confusion, reduces conflict, and prevents any one person from becoming overwhelmed. Everyone involved should understand the disabled person’s needs and preferences and the role public benefits play in their care. When caregivers and decision-makers are on the same page, care is more consistent, benefits are better protected, and transitions—expected and unexpected—are easier to manage.

An estate planning attorney can serve as the hub in the special needs planning structure, helping to identify areas of concern, suggest options, and connect families with disability professionals, resources, and solutions.


  1. Gary L. Albrect & Patrick J. Devlieger, The Disability Paradox: High Quality of Life Against All Odds, ScienceDirect (Apr. 8, 1999), https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0277953698004110. ↩︎
  2. Amy J. Houtrow et al., Health Care Cost Concerns and Hardships for Families of Children With Disabilities, Nat’l Libr. Med., Apr. 24, 2025, https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12022804. ↩︎
  3. Donna Anderson et al., The Personal Costs of Caring for a Child with a Disability: A Review of the Literature, Nat’l Libr. Med., Jan.–Feb. 2007, https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC1802121. ↩︎

Protect Your Estate from Cyberthreats

Well, that doesn’t seem right. 

It usually starts with something small. A strange email from a bank you do not recognize. A new credit card account you do not remember opening. A password reset link you never requested. A notice from the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) that someone has already filed a tax return in your name. 

At first there is confusion. No, there’s no way that’s right. 

Then anxiety sets in. Am I being scammed? 

After that, you may spend hours or days on the phone with banks, credit bureaus, and government agencies to reach an unsettling conclusion: Someone has my information and is pretending to be me. 

Next comes anger, frustration, and a sense of violation. How could this happen?

Acceptance eventually sets in, along with a determination to never let scammers get the upper hand again. But sometimes it is too late. The damage has been done—to finances, reputation, peace of mind, and, sometimes, legacy. 

Preventing cybercrimes such as identity theft starts with awareness, including the recognition that cybersecurity is not just an IT problem or something that affects businesses. It is a personal wealth preservation issue that can affect you not only now but also after you are gone, making it crucial to strengthen your digital defenses long before your estate reaches administration. 

Scammers routinely target estates, executors, and grieving families, often by mining obituaries and public probate records to launch phishing, impersonation, and identity-theft schemes.

Growing Cyberthreats and Their Impact on Estate Planning

You may have started to take the first steps toward creating a digital estate plan, but that planning should also account for the growing risks that cybercriminals pose to both your assets and your legacy.

  • Seventy-three percent of US adults have experienced some form of online scam or cyberattack. Most report weekly scam calls, text, and emails.1 
  • Americans reported 2.6 million fraud cases and 1.1 million identity-theft incidents to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) in 2024. Losses exceeded $12.5 billion, a 25 percent increase over the prior year.2
  • Identity theft is now one of the most common types of consumer fraud, with nearly 750,000 cases in the first half of 2025 alone.3 
  • Seventy-six percent of consumers say they feel more anxious about cybersecurity today than they did two years ago, driven by impersonation enabled by artificial intelligence (AI) and increasingly sophisticated scams.4

Cybercriminals now use AI-generated voice clones to impersonate loved ones, breached financial and medical data to answer security questions, and automated scraping of public records to target people with unnerving precision. You will very likely be targeted at some point and may have already been a victim of cybercrime. Even if you avoid direct harm during your lifetime, your estate and heirs may be more vulnerable after your death.

Why Estates Can Be Vulnerable to Cybercriminals

The FBI reports that in 2024, Americans over age 60 were the most frequently targeted demographic for online scams and fraud and lost the most money to cybercrimes.5

Fraud schemes targeting the estates of people who have passed away are another area of growing cybercrime concern.6 As with older adults, estates, particularly those of seniors, are often perceived as holding substantial assets. The individuals and property involved with estate administration can also create unique vulnerabilities that attract cybercriminals. 

  • The loved ones left behind are often overwhelmed and distracted after a loved one’s death, making them more susceptible to scams. Cybercriminals use times of chaos, confusion, and heightened emotion to their advantage, preying on feelings such as fear, urgency, and trust during times when people may let their guard down. 
  • Executors may be unfamiliar with digital security, making phishing attempts more successful.
  • Multiple parties (attorneys, advisors, banks, beneficiaries) are exchanging sensitive documents during estate administration, sometimes through unsecured or informal methods.
  • The deceased person’s dormant accounts are often easy entry points for identity theft because they often go unmonitored, rely on outdated passwords, and may be tied to personal information that criminals can exploit before anyone realizes that there is a problem.
  • Scammers routinely impersonate banks, government agencies, attorneys, or even the executor.
  • Probate is public, giving criminals a ready-made list of heirs, contact information, and sometimes asset details.

Social engineering attacks—scams that use deception rather than technical hacking—that rely on sophisticated cybertools such as AI to exploit basic human psychology and manipulate people are on the rise.7 And just as cybercriminals capitalize on natural disasters8 and tech outages,9 the estate administration process is a scenario that could provide the perfect opening for fraud and deception. 

A Digital Defense Plan for Your Estate

You would not leave your physical property unsecured, but without a digital defense plan, you are essentially leaving the front door unlocked to cyberthieves, compromising your traditional and digital assets. Understanding points of vulnerability and taking a few simple precautions can help reduce your exposure to cybercrimes. 

Issue: Email is the weakest link. Most cyberattacks begin with email.

  • What you can do: Use strong passwords, multifactor authentication (MFA), and encrypted document-sharing platforms. Avoid sending unprotected sensitive materials, and encourage your executors to follow the same security practices when administering your estate.

Issue: Executors cannot secure what they cannot see. Unknown or dormant accounts often remain open and unmonitored, making them prime targets for takeover and identity theft.

  • What you can do: Create a detailed inventory of important digital accounts and storage locations. Ensure that fiduciaries (such as your executors and advisors) know what accounts must be closed, monitored, or secured.

Issue: Sensitive legal and tax documents are insecurely stored or shared. Wills, statements, and tax documents often sit unprotected in inboxes or cloud folders.

  • What you can do: Store documents securely using online encrypted folders or password-protected vaults, and ensure that fiduciaries know where to find documents and how to access them.

Issue: Executors may not be prepared for digital threats. Phishing attempts surge during estate administration, and many executors are unfamiliar with digital-security practices.

  • What you can do: Name a tech-literate executor (or coexecutor) who is comfortable managing digital accounts and security protocols. Include with your estate planning documents a brief “executor security checklist” that outlines verification steps (such as confirming account ownership and access authority) and highlights common red flags, such as urgent payment requests, unexpected account changes, or requests for credentials.

Issue: Probate exposes personal information. Public probate court filings often disclose the names and contact information of executors and beneficiaries and may even include a list of assets with their values—information that scammers can easily weaponize.

  • What you can do: Talk with your attorney about whether trust-based planning or other probate-avoidance tools can reduce public exposure of your estate and limit targeted fraud.

Issue: Heirs and beneficiaries are prime targets for impersonation scams. Criminals impersonate banks, attorneys, courts, or even executors to solicit money or sensitive data. For example, a scammer may send an email posing as the estate’s bank or attorney, claiming an urgent problem with an account and requesting immediate payment or login credentials from a beneficiary or executor.

  • What you can do: Educate executors and beneficiaries about how to spot and avoid common scams10 and establish a simple verification process for unexpected requests.

Issue: Identity theft of the deceased is common. Dormant and unmonitored accounts create easy entry points and are frequently hijacked after death. Criminals use a decedent’s information found in public records and online obituaries to open credit accounts, redirect mail, submit false change-of-address forms, or file fraudulent tax returns.

  • What you can do: Develop a postdeath digital and identity-protection checklist for your estate and executor. This should include promptly notifying the major credit bureaus of the death, placing a credit freeze or fraud alert on the decedent’s credit file, forwarding and monitoring mail, filing the final tax return and IRS death notification, and quickly closing, consolidating, or memorializing unused online accounts and financial profiles.

Do Not Become a Cybercrime Statistic

Cybercrime statistics are sobering. We all know the risks of falling prey to online fraudsters, but when knowledge is not paired with action, it is an invitation for disaster. A proactive approach to cybersecurity rooted in awareness, preparation, and avoiding high-risk situations is key to securing your estate—and your legacy—in a digital world.

  1. Jeffrey Gottfried, Eugenie Park, & Monica Anderson, Online Scams and Attacks in America Today, Pew Rsch. Ctr. (July 31, 2025), https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2025/07/31/online-scams-and-attacks-in-america-today. ↩︎
  2. New FTC Data Show a Big Jump in Reported Losses to Fraud to $12.5 Billion in 2024, Fed. Trade Comm’n (Mar. 10, 2025), https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/news/press-releases/2025/03/new-ftc-data-show-big-jump-reported-losses-fraud-125-billion-2024. ↩︎
  3. Jack Caporal, Identity Theft and Credit Card Fraud Statistics for 2025, MotleyFoolMoney (Aug. 15, 2025), https://www.fool.com/money/research/identity-theft-credit-card-fraud-statistics. ↩︎
  4. Vicky Hyman, When It Comes to Fraud, a Sense of Insecurity and Even Inevitability, Global Survey Shows, Mastercard Cybersecurity (Oct. 6, 2025), https://www.mastercard.com/us/en/news-and-trends/stories/2025/consumer-cybersecurity-survey.html. ↩︎
  5. Press Release, FBI, FBI Releases Annual Internet Crime Report (Apr. 23, 2025), https://www.fbi.gov/news/press-releases/fbi-releases-annual-internet-crime-report. ↩︎
  6. Henry Rinder, Fraud Targeting the Elderly and Estates: A Growing Concern, NJCPA (Sept. 23, 2024), https://www.njcpa.org/stayinformed/news/blog/post/njcpa-focus/2024/09/23/fraud-targeting-the-elderly-and-estates–a-growing-concern.
    ↩︎
  7. Michelle Maratto & Sana Hashmat, Unmasking Social Engineering: Protecting Your Wealth from Deceptive Cyber Tactics, J.P. Morgan Wealth Mgmt. (Oct. 1, 2025), https://www.jpmorgan.com/insights/cybersecurity/phishing/unmasking-social-engineering-protecting-your-wealth-from-deceptive-cyber-tactics.
    ↩︎
  8. Niamh Ancell, Cybercriminals Capitalize on LA Wildfire Chaos via Fake GoFundMe’s and Crypto Coins, Cybernews (Jan. 17, 2025), https://cybernews.com/cybercrime/cybercriminals-exploit-la-wildfires.
    ↩︎
  9. Brian Fung & Sean Lyngaas, Hackers Are Already Taking Advantage of the CrowdStrike Outage Chaos, CNN Bus. (July 22, 2024), https://www.cnn.com/2024/07/22/tech/hackers-crowdstrike-outage-scams. ↩︎
  10. How to Avoid Imposter Scams, Fed. Trade Comm’m Consumer Advice, https://consumer.ftc.gov/features/how-avoid-imposter-scams (last visited Dec. 22, 2025). ↩︎

Secure Your Digital Wallet: Cryptocurrency and Your Estate Plan

In 2013, British IT worker James Howells accidentally threw away a hard drive while cleaning his house. Only later did he realize that it held the private key to 8,000 Bitcoin that are now worth hundreds of millions of dollars.1

For more than a decade, he has tried unsuccessfully to persuade local officials to let him dig up the landfill where he believes the drive lies buried, even offering to buy the landfill, to no avail. 

His desperation illustrates not just the meteoric rise of Bitcoin and cryptocurrencies but also a fundamental aspect of what sets these assets apart: Without the private key, the Bitcoin is gone forever. There is no password reset and no recovery mechanism.

Crypto is the only asset class where a simple loss of access, not market decline, can wipe out an entire fortune. And that risk does not disappear when you die. If your executor cannot locate the wallet, seed phrase, or authentication steps, the asset may as well not exist.

Howells learned the hard way a lesson for crypto-owning clients: You need an estate plan that accounts for how uniquely valuable—and fragile—these assets can be. 

Crypto Goes Mainstream

When Howells first mined his Bitcoin, cryptocurrency was known mostly within tech circles. Since 2013, however, the value on the drive he inadvertently discarded has exploded from around $9 million to nearly $923 million,2 tracking the dramatic rise of crypto into a widely held asset. Indeed, many experts and reports consider 2025 the year that crypto went mainstream.3 

No longer a niche experiment, Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies are now widely viewed as “digital gold” and, often, a hedge against traditional assets. Bitcoin alone has a market capitalization near $2 trillion, making it one of the world’s largest assets, ranked ahead of major global companies.4

Despite volatility, Bitcoin’s long-term performance has been extraordinary. Ten-year returns exceed 26,000 percent, far outpacing the S&P 500, gold, oil, and US Treasury bonds.5 A modest $100 in Bitcoin in 2014 would have been worth nearly $27,000 in 2024.6 

Gains such as these explain why Howells is still willing to unearth tons of garbage—and why crypto has attracted millions of investors. What was once a fringe experiment has moved firmly into the financial mainstream, though estimates of how many Americans hold cryptocurrency vary widely.

  • A June 2025 Gallup survey found that 14 percent of US adults across all age groups own Bitcoin or another cryptocurrency, rising to nearly 25 percent for men ages 18–49.7
  • A Security.org study places total US crypto ownership much higher, at 28 percent across all age groups (about 65 million adults).8
  • Federal Reserve estimates come in far lower, at around 4.3 percent.9

Interestingly, Federal Reserve data also shows that only 2–3 percent of US consumers use cryptocurrency for everyday purchases or money transfers.10 This suggests that most owners view crypto primarily as a long-term rather than a short-term play and supports the crypto community mantra “HODL” (“hold on for dear life”).

This growing level of adoption has also fueled a strong sense of confidence among crypto proponents. As Howells posted on X in August 2025: “You can block the gates. You can pack the courts. But you cannot block the blockchain. Crypto has already won.”11 A blockchain is a shared digital record book stored across many computers that securely tracks transactions and cannot easily be changed or erased. In essence, Howells is expressing his belief that cryptocurrency is too decentralized to be stopped by traditional power structures like governments, courts, or regulators.

That confidence, however, exists alongside a far less predictable market reality, and opinions on it can vary as much as its price fluctuations. One could argue that early adopters like Howells are the biggest winners: Bitcoin hit a record high in late 2025. But six weeks later, all its gains for the year had been erased,12 giving credence to the crypto naysayers. 

However, more former critics are coming around as institutional investors, financial advisors, and Main Street buyers push crypto further into respectability.13 Kevin O’Leary, Shark Tank’s “Mr. Wonderful,” once called Bitcoin “garbage” (before he flipped from crypto skeptic to investor).14 

From Speculation to Protection: What Sets Crypto Apart

Part of what makes crypto a unique asset is that it presents more than one way to lose big. Market volatility is a risk with every asset, and cryptocurrency is certainly no exception. However, unlike a brokerage or banking account, with cryptocurrency, a simple oversight (like Howells’s) can erase all your holdings. 

Every Bitcoin transaction requires a private key or an encrypted string proving ownership of the crypto funds held in a particular wallet. Coinbase likens it to a “password that unlocks the virtual vault that holds your money.”15 In Howells’s case, that safeguard became the problem: The missing hard drive contains a record of the private key. Without it, he cannot access his Bitcoin. 

Therein lies the heart of the estate planning issue for crypto owners: Access must be identified, documented, and shared with the right people ahead of time. There is no mechanism—not through the courts, not through custodians, not through the blockchain—for an executor or other digital fiduciary to recover a lost private key.

Decentralization is what makes crypto appealing to many investors. It is also why proactive planning is essential to preserve this digital asset. Crypto may be the future of money. However, unless you address access and other unique crypto issues while you are alive, your crypto holdings could be impossible to preserve, manage, or transfer after your passing. 

How to Hold on for Dear Life: A Crypto Preservation Plan

Whether you are a longtime “HODLer” or a recent crypto investor, not having a plan to access and preserve your funds can lead to catastrophic, irreversible loss. Below are core crypto issues that your digital estate plan should cover to keep your funds safe and shareable. 

Issue: Keeping your crypto accessible. Crypto has no password reset, no customer service line, and no central authority to recover lost assets. If your heirs or executors cannot locate your wallets, keys, or access steps, or if your estate plan documents do not authorize access, your crypto may be permanently unrecoverable.

What you can do:

  • Create a secure detailed inventory of your wallets, platforms, and holdings. Keep it somewhere safe and encrypted.
  • Appoint a tech-savvy executor or a digital executor and update your will or trust to specifically reference crypto and grant access rights under state law.
  • Store private keys, seed phrases, and multifactor authentication (MFA) backup codes securely. Let a trusted person know where these instructions are kept in case of an emergency.

Issue: Keeping your crypto safe. Crypto is vulnerable to hacking, phishing, and fraud, both during life and after death. Weak cybersecurity, insecure storage, or missing documentation can put your assets and estate at risk and create tax complications for your heirs (for example, difficulty establishing cost basis, reporting taxable gains, or responding to inquiries by the Internal Revenue Service (IRS)).

What you can do:

  • Use a reputable password manager and enable MFA for all crypto-related accounts. Never list passwords or private keys in your will. Create a separate secure method for your trusted agents or executors to access your accounts.
  • Back up recovery codes, wallet instructions, and key documentation in an encrypted, nonpublic location to prevent loss from device failure or theft.
  • Keep thorough transaction records and understand the tax rules. Under existing guidance, the IRS treats crypto as property—not currency—meaning that transfers, exchanges, and sales may trigger capital-gains taxes; lifetime transfers may require gift-tax reporting; and valuable crypto holdings may increase your taxable estate.

Secure Your Wallet, Secure Your Legacy

Whether you hold crypto as a diversification asset, view decentralized digital currencies as the future of money, or fall somewhere in between, ensure that your crypto accounting goes beyond investment strategy and includes estate plan considerations. Thoughtful estate planning can help preserve access, reduce confusion, and protect the value of your crypto for the people you intend to benefit.

  1. Ryan Gladwin, Man Fails to Buy Landfill with His Lost $923M Bitcoin—Here’s His New Plan, Yahoo!Finance (Aug. 5, 2025), https://finance.yahoo.com/news/man-fails-buy-landfill-lost-100824532.html. ↩︎
  2. Id. ↩︎
  3. Daren Matsuoka et al., State of Crypto 2025: The Year Crypto Went Mainstream, a16zcryto (Oct. 22, 2025), https://a16zcrypto.com/posts/article/state-of-crypto-report-2025. ↩︎
  4. DeepNewz, Bitcoin Surpasses Google with Over $2 Trillion Market Cap, Becomes Sixth Largest Asset Globally, The Defiant (May 19, 2025), https://thedefiant.io/news/markets/bitcoin-surpasses-google-over-2-trillion-market-cap-becomes-sixth-largest-asset-77ec71e0. ↩︎
  5. Prem Reginald, Bitcoin Outperformed Traditional Assets by Over 26,000% in the Last Decade, CoinGecko (Dec. 13, 2024), https://www.coingecko.com/research/publications/bitcoin-versus-traditional-assets-price-returns. ↩︎
  6. Id. ↩︎
  7. Jeffrey M. Jones & Lydia Saad, Cryptocurrency Still Has Limited Main Street Appeal, Gallup (July 22, 2025), https://news.gallup.com/poll/692777/cryptocurrency-limited-main-street-appeal.aspx. ↩︎
  8. Brett Cruz, 2025 Cryptocurrency Adoption and Consumer Sentiment Report, Security (Nov. 21, 2025), https://www.security.org/digital-security/cryptocurrency-annual-consumer-report. ↩︎
  9. Juan M. Sánchez & Masataka Mori, Cryptocurrency Ownership Among U.S. Households, Fed. Rsrv. Bank of St. Louis (Mar. 11, 2025), https://www.stlouisfed.org/on-the-economy/2025/mar/cryptocurrency-ownership-us-households. ↩︎
  10. Fumiko Hayashi & Aditi Routh, U.S. Consumers’ Use of Cryptocurrency for Payments, Fed. Rsrv. Bank of Kansas City (Sept. 24, 2025) https://www.kansascityfed.org/research/payments-system-research-briefings/us-consumers-use-of-cryptocurrency-for-payments. ↩︎
  11. James Howells (@howelzy), X (Aug. 4, 2025, at 10:59 CT), https://x.com/howelzy/status/1952399001346527334. ↩︎
  12. John Towfighi, Why Crypto Is Melting Down and Stocks Keep Falling, CNN Bus. (Nov. 18, 2025), https://www.cnn.com/2025/11/18/business/bitcoin-price-crypto-stocks. ↩︎
  13. Alexey Bondarev, 10 of the Harshest Bitcoin Critics Who Flipped to Become Frantic Crypto Believers, Yellow (Jan. 4, 2025), https://yellow.com/en-US/news/10-of-the-harshest-bitcoin-critics-who-flipped-to-become-frantic-crypto-believers. ↩︎
  14. Kevin Helms, Shark Tank’s Kevin O’Leary Reverses Stance on Bitcoin, Says Crypto Is Here to Stay, Invests 3% of His Portfolio, Bitcoin (Feb. 28, 2021), (https://news.bitcoin.com/shark-tanks-kevin-oleary-bitcoin-cryptocurrencies-here-to-stay-invests-portfolio. ↩︎
  15. What Is a Private Key? Coinbase, https://www.coinbase.com/learn/crypto-basics/what-is-a-private-key (last visited Dec. 22, 2025). ↩︎

Do Not Let Your Digital Life Die with You

Today, so much of what once existed in material form now lives entirely online. Our photos, finances, business operations, and even our identities are stored on devices and platforms and in cloud accounts. Without proper planning, these valuable digital assets can easily be lost or become inaccessible after we die.

As a sign of the times and how deeply virtual and physical life have merged, most of us no longer distinguish between assets we can touch and those that exist only online. You cannot put cryptocurrency in your back pocket, but you can move it instantly via the phone that is in your pocket. You cannot walk into your e-commerce store, but it can generate thousands in income each month for you, and that money flows directly into your online accounts where you never physically see a dollar or cent. 

Digital assets are every bit as real and valuable as traditional property—sometimes even more so. Yet many people do not treat them that way in their estate plan. Your plan may account for your home and heirlooms, but what about your Venmo balance, web domains, or crypto wallets?

A Day in the (Digital) Life

Think about how many digital assets you interact with on a daily basis. Your smartphone unlocks to reveal years’ worth of photos, messages, authentication codes, and logins. You can go online to check banking and investment apps, pay bills, move money through PayPal or Venmo, and access cloud storage, subscriptions, rewards programs, and digital wallets. By day’s end, you have used dozens of digital accounts, some holding real monetary value, others containing irreplaceable personal history. Yet most people do not recognize that these items are part of their overall estate.

A recent Bryn Mawr Trust survey found that Americans now place an average value of nearly $200,000 on their digital assets, and 79 percent say that protecting those assets is important—almost identical to the 78 percent who feel that way about traditional financial assets.1 However, only 44 percent of those working with financial advisors say that the topic of digital assets and digital estate planning has ever been raised.2

People also underestimate the size of their digital footprint. Respondents to the same survey reported having anywhere from a handful to approximately 250 digital accounts, and many could not even estimate how many files they have.3

  • Twenty-nine percent say they feel very or somewhat knowledgeable about digital assets.
  • Twenty-one percent say they have only “a little knowledge.”
  • Twenty-seven percent have heard the term digital assets but know almost nothing about it.
  • Fifteen percent have never heard the term.4

If any of these findings hit home for you, you may be facing one of the major conundrums of the digital world: We constantly interact with digital assets but often have no idea what they actually are, let alone how to protect them.

So what exactly counts as a digital asset today?

Defining Digital Assets

Digital assets include any electronically stored pieces of information you own, use, control, or derive value from as well as the accounts, platforms, and devices where that information is stored. They generally fall into several categories:

  • Personal communications and media: emails, text messages, digital photos and videos, social media profiles
  • Creative and intellectual property: blogs, websites, domain names, digital artwork, nonfungible tokens (NFTs)
  • Financial and asset-based accounts: online bank and brokerage accounts, crypto wallets, payment apps
  • Business and commercial digital assets: e-commerce stores, bookkeeping and payroll platforms, monetized social media
  • Subscription and licensed digital property: e-books, digital movies and music, gaming libraries
  • Security and authentication tools: password managers, authenticator apps, encrypted drives
  • Records, data, and personal identity: online statements, tax and medical portals, biometric identifiers
  • Rewards and loyalty programs: airline miles, hotel points, credit card rewards
  • Digital memorabilia and archived content: genealogy accounts, cloud-stored archives
  • Connected devices: smartphones, tablets, computers, smart home devices tied to cloud accounts

Living in our digital world, differentiating between a digital asset and a traditional asset is not as obvious as it might seem. With so much of our lives now online, it is a bit like asking a fish, “What is water?” We are so immersed in digital assets, we almost do not perceive them for what they are: distinct assets that require a distinct protection plan. 

How to Protect Digital Assets in Your Estate Plan

Even if you understand what digital assets are, they can be easy to overlook in your estate plan. Here are some of the most common digital risks and the practical steps you can take to address them. 

Not knowing what digital assets you own. Most people do not realize how much of their life runs through digital channels. Creating a complete digital asset inventory is the first step toward securing your digital legacy. 

What you can do:

  • Walk through a typical day, then a week, then a month.
  • Write down every digital touchpoint: apps, accounts, bills, subscriptions, cloud storage, and financial platforms.
  • Add these items to your digital asset inventory.

Losing access to your own digital accounts (and leaving loved ones locked out later). Without a clear plan, loved ones may never recover important digital property, from payment app balances to cryptocurrency to unused reward points.

What you can do:

  • Go through each account in your digital asset inventory.
  • Store access instructions (not passwords) securely.
  • Let someone you trust know where your inventory and access instructions are stored.

Losing irreplaceable photos, videos, messages, and personal history. If everything lives on one device or inside a locked cloud account, your priceless memories may disappear forever.

What you can do:

  • Designate Apple or Google legacy contacts to allow approved access after death.5
  • Back up important media to a secure shared folder accessible to a spouse or trusted family member or advisor. 
  • Periodically review what is stored only on your phones, computers, tablets, or private accounts and move critical items to a protected backup or shared account.

Executors facing access barriers during estate settlement. Executors need access to your bills, statements, or important online documents but may be blocked without the right authority.

What you can do:

  • Appoint a digital executor (or coexecutor).
  • Tell your executor which accounts they may need to access during administration so they know what to look for and where to begin.
  • Ensure that your will or trust gives them explicit access rights.

Identity theft or fraud after death. Criminals often target the deceased, taking advantage of dormant accounts or publicly available probate information.

What you can do:

  • Maintain an updated digital asset list so your executor knows what to secure or close quickly.
  • Consider using a living trust to avoid probate court after your passing and reduce the public exposure that goes with it.
  • Ensure that your executor (or digital executor) knows how to notify credit bureaus and freeze the credit file immediately after death.

Weak cybersecurity that puts your estate (and loved ones) at risk. Simple mistakes such as weak passwords, no multifactor authentication (MFA), or storing sensitive details in unprotected files create vulnerabilities now and later.

What you can do:

  • Use MFA and a reputable password manager for stronger security.
  • Document your MFA methods (backup codes, authenticator apps) in a secure, nonpublic place so a spouse or other trusted contact can use them in an emergency.
  • Never write passwords in your will. Instead, ensure that your will or trust names a digital executor or trustee and grants them the necessary access rights.

Bring Your Digital Estate into the 21st Century

We are living in a digital world; an estate plan that is not purposefully designed to protect digital assets is incomplete and out of date. 

If your estate plan has not been revisited in the past few years with an eye toward safeguarding your digital legacy, it needs attention. For help bringing your estate plan into the 21st century, schedule a time to talk with us.

  1. Jamie Hopkins, Bryn Mawr Trust Survey Reveals Americans Value Digital Assets at $191,516 on Average, but Gaps Exist in Digital Asset Awareness and Estate Planning, Bryn Mawr Tr. (Dec. 5, 2024), https://www.bmt.com/news-insights-events/bryn-mawr-trust-survey.
    ↩︎
  2. Id. ↩︎
  3. Id. ↩︎
  4. Id. ↩︎
  5. Roger Fingas, Who Handles Your Death Better? Google, Facebook, and Apple Compared, Android Auth. (Jan. 16, 2022), https://www.androidauthority.com/data-after-death-google-facebook-apple-3088700. ↩︎

Estate Planning Facts for the Holiday Season

Every year around the holidays, stores and malls across America are transformed into winter wonderlands, complete with elves, ornaments, artificial snow, and larger-than-life decorations. 

Many children stare in wide-eyed wonder as they wait to sit on Santa’s lap and answer a singularly important question: What do you want for Christmas this year?

While some children are prepared to share their most heartfelt wishes, others may need a little prompting. Santa may start with gentler questions to build rapport and earn their trust: How old are you? Have you been good this year? Do you have brothers or sisters?

As adults, we might find the mall Santa a bit campy, but there is a lesson to be learned from him about communication: relaxed, friendly small talk and the right questions can open the door to deeper conversations about family, goals, and values. 

For your next holiday get-together, here are a few festive facts and conversation starters to help you reflect on your own estate plan and hopefully also inspire a meaningful discussion at our next meeting.

Season of Giving

Holiday Fact: On average, each American plans to spend $890.49 on holiday gifts, food, decorations, and other holiday items this year. 1

Estate Planning Fact: Approximately 68 percent of Americans do not have a will, yet everyone has a legacy to pass on, regardless of their wealth.

Thought to Unwrap: If you could leave one meaningful gift to your loved ones, what would it be?

Treasures of Time

Holiday Fact: More than 97 percent of Americans decorate the inside of their home for the holidays. 2

Estate Planning Fact: Wills can include family heirlooms such as holiday china, vintage ornaments, menorahs, or kinara.

Thought to Unwrap: Do you have family traditions or heirlooms you would like to pass on to a loved one?

Peace on Earth

Holiday Fact: Nearly 40 percent of families say they have disagreements during holiday gatherings. About one-third of those arguments turn into lasting family problems, and almost 20 percent of people say the fights even caused someone to change their will or estate plan.3

Estate Planning Fact: An estate plan can help avoid family conflict by providing loved ones with clear instructions and eliminating guesswork during emotionally challenging times.

Thought to Unwrap: Has your family faced past disagreements that might shape how you plan for the future?

Shorter Days

Holiday Fact: The winter solstice (December 21, 2025) marks the shortest day of the year but not the earliest sunset, which occurs about two weeks earlier.4 

Estate Planning Fact: A trust can help shorten or avoid the lengthy probate process when time is of the essence.

Thought to Unwrap: What matters most to you—time saved, privacy, or control—when it comes to settling your affairs?

Fur-ever Gifts

Holiday Fact: A 2024 survey found that 6 percent of Americans planned to spend over $1,000 on holiday gifts for their pets, with the largest segment of pet owners (15 percent) planning to spend between $51 and $75. 5

Estate Planning Fact: Estate plans can include provisions for pets; celebrity designer Karl Lagerfeld famously left millions to his cat.

Thought to Unwrap: If something unexpected happened, who would step in to look after your pets, and how would you want them cared for?

Will Power Season

Holiday Fact: Unlike UPS and FedEx—private businesses that can set their own policies—the United States Postal Service is a government agency regulated by Congress. It cannot set its own policies and is required by law to deliver to every US address, even the most remote ones.6

Estate Planning Fact: If you do not have a will, default state laws could determine who inherits from you and how much they get. 

Thought to Unwrap: How comfortable are you with letting state law decide who inherits from you?

Little Lights, Bright Futures

Holiday Fact: Parents spend an average of around $173 per child on holiday gifts.7 

Estate Planning Fact: Most parents with minor children do not have a will.8 

Thought to Unwrap: Whom would you trust to care for your children if you cannot, and what qualities matter most in that role?

Wills for All Seasons

Holiday Fact: Millennials and Gen Z spend more on self-gifting than any other age group, redefining what “giving” means.9

Estate Planning Fact: Adults under 35 are now more likely to have an estate plan than those aged 35 to 54,10 reversing a long-held assumption. 

Thought to Unwrap: How do you see your stage of life shaping the kind of legacy you want to build?

Making a List

Holiday Fact: A Gallup poll from 2023 found that nearly half of shoppers (49 percent) planned to do most of their holiday shopping in December, while 16 percent planned to do all their holiday shopping in December. 11

Estate Planning Fact: Forty-three percent of Americans without a will cite procrastination as the main reason.12

Thought to Unwrap: What is one estate planning task you have been meaning to check off your list?

Tidings of Charity

Holiday Fact: About 30 percent of annual charitable donations occur in December.13

Estate Planning Fact: You can set aside funds in your estate plan to give to a charitable cause in a family’s name.

Thought to Unwrap: Are there causes or organizations that have made a lasting impact on your life?

Wishing You Good Tidings (and Even Better Planning)

While we are not asking about the gifts you hope to receive this year, we encourage you to have an honest and heartfelt conversation with us and your loved ones about your hopes for the future. 

A single, meaningful conversation with us can set the stage for lasting peace of mind that extends long after the holidays. If you would like to create or update your existing estate plan to align with your future goals, please call us.

  1. Consumers to Spend Second-Highest Amount on Record, According to NRF Holiday Survey, Nat’l Retail Found. (Oct. 16, 2025), https://nrf.com/media-center/press-releases/consumers-to-spend-second-highest-amount-on-record-according-to-nrf-holiday-survey. ↩︎
  2. Julia Pelly, Christmas Decor Trends 2025: What Are the Most Popular Decorations in America?, Angi (Oct. 9, 2025), https://www.angi.com/articles/christmas-decor-trends.htm. ↩︎
  3. Family Arguments During the Holidays Can Have Profound Consequences, According to New Survey from Trust & Will, PR Newswire (Nov. 19, 2024), https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/family-arguments-during-the-holidays-can-have-profound-consequences-according-to-new-survey-from-trust–will-302309908.html. ↩︎
  4. Jane Rose & Karin Crompton, 25 Facts About the Winter Solstice, the Shortest Day of the Year, Mental Floss (Dec. 18, 2023), https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/72659/10-things-you-probably-didnt-know-about-winter-solstice. ↩︎
  5. Betty Lin-Fisher, Pet ownership is up. So is consumer spending on dogs, cats for the holidays, USA Today (Dec. 21, 2024), https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2024/12/21/pet-spending-holiday-statistics/76947872007. ↩︎
  6. Tyler Powell and David Wessel, How is the U.S. Postal Service governed and funded?, Brookings (Aug. 26, 2020), https://www.brookings.edu/articles/how-is-the-u-s-postal-service-governed-and-funded. ↩︎
  7. Stephanie Weaver, Here’s how much parents spend on holiday gifts for each child, Live Now Fox (Nov. 21, 2024), https://www.livenowfox.com/news/how-much-parents-spend-holiday-gifts-each-child. ↩︎
  8. Victoria Lurie, 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study, Caring (Sept. 17, 2025), https://www.caring.com/resources/wills-survey. ↩︎
  9. Jing Feng, Young adults are keeping themselves on their holiday gift lists, NBC News (Dec. 22, 2024), https://www.nbcnews.com/business/consumer/young-adults-are-keeping-holiday-gift-lists-rcna184447. ↩︎
  10. Victoria Lurie, 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study, Caring (Sept. 17, 2025), https://www.caring.com/resources/wills-survey. ↩︎
  11. Jeffrey M. Jones, December Holiday Rush for Half of U.S. Shoppers, Gallup (Dec. 7, 2023), https://news.gallup.com/poll/545537/december-holiday-rush-half-shoppers.aspx. ↩︎
  12. Victoria Lurie, 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study, Caring (Sept. 17, 2025), https://www.caring.com/resources/wills-survey. ↩︎
  13. Daniel Hall, Why 30% Donate in December: Year-End Giving Statistics, Harness, https://www.goharness.com/blog-posts/year-end-giving-statistics. ↩︎

National Regifting Day: Regifting for Your Future

During the holidays, we usually receive at least one gift that, let’s face it, falls a bit flat. 

When we were young, it might have been an itchy sweater from Grandma or a toy from Mom and Dad that we had outgrown. As adults, maybe someone got your clothing size wrong or misjudged your taste in jewelry, or you ended up with a regrettable White Elephant exchange gift.

You could be honest with the gift giver and request a return or an exchange, but you do not want to hurt their feelings. So you act happy and surprised, though you already know the gift is bound for a box in the basement or a future trip to Goodwill. Then you think of someone who would like it, and a plot is hatched: the regift.

National Regifting Day takes place on the Thursday before Christmas and celebrates giving an unwanted gift to someone else—especially at holiday office parties—as a way to promote sustainability and mindful consumption.1 Observers of the day generally follow a few simple rules: do not regift the item to the original giver, do not regift something handmade or personalized, and always rewrap it thoughtfully.

While National Regifting Day is lighthearted, it reminds us of the value of intentional giving and the importance of considering not only what we give but how it will be received.

In estate planning, some “gifts” can be regifted, revised, or exchanged over time, while others, once given, are final. The key is knowing the difference and ensuring that you have left a kind of “receipt in the bag” in case an exchange becomes necessary and the “return window” is still open.

Regiftable Assets: What You Can Update While You Are Alive

Some parts of an estate plan are flexible while you are alive and have capacity (i.e., are of sound mind and can manage your own affairs). Think of these as the “regiftable” parts: the ones that can be exchanged or updated as life changes. With estate planning, it is not about passing along an unwanted gift, but rather thoughtfully repurposing your original intentions—redirecting how future distributions to loved ones will be shared while keeping the same spirit of generosity at the heart of it all.

  • Will. You can change, add, or remove beneficiaries; update how your beneficiaries are to receive their gifts; and nominate or change guardians of minor children.
  • Beneficiary designations. The beneficiaries that you designate on life insurance policies, retirement accounts, and payable-on-death accounts can be updated at any time. These designations should be made thoughtfully and coordinated with your overall estate plan; for example, naming your living trust as a beneficiary if it aligns with your overall goals.
  • Revocable trusts. You can adjust the trust terms, trustees, beneficiaries, and distribution plans while you are alive and have the capacity to do so. However, keep in mind that properties in multiple states or foreign accounts, or properties that may require updates, may make the process a bit more complicated and require extra legal steps.
  • Powers of attorney and healthcare directives. These documents can be changed or revoked as long as you retain the capacity to make decisions. If a progressive illness develops, updates may need to occur in stages.
  • Lifetime gifts and charitable plans. You can make gifts or donations during your lifetime, but the flexibility of those gifts depends on the setup. Once you give something outright, it is usually not possible to take it back. Gifts made through a revocable trust or donor-advised fund can typically be changed while you still have the capacity to do so. Bigger or more structured gifts, such as those made through irrevocable trusts or foundations, are generally permanent once established.

Returns and Exchanges: Harder to Make Changes While You Are Alive

Other estate planning choices come with a shorter “return window.” While not completely irreversible, they are much harder to change without court or administrative involvement.

  • Irrevocable trusts. These trusts are established to be irrevocable once they have been signed and generally cannot be altered. However, some states do allow limited updates under certain conditions without the necessity of going to court.
  • Revocable living trusts during incapacity or after death. Once the trustmaker (also called the grantor or settlor) becomes incapacitated or dies, the living trust’s terms typically become fixed—much like an irrevocable trust. In certain situations, limited updates can still be made without court approval, depending on the state’s laws. Other ways to build in flexibility include adding spendthrift provisions or giving successor trustees certain discretionary powers, creating some wiggle room by allowing them to make decisions or adjustments as circumstances change, without needing to alter the trust itself.

No Returns Available: When Gifts Are Final

There are some parts of an estate plan that become final once they are carried out, and only in rare situations, such as cases involving fraud, coercion, or a clear mistake, can those actions be undone.

  • Final distributions. After gifts and inheritances have been made from a will or trust and are in the hands of the beneficiaries, they generally cannot be changed or taken back.
  • Delivered lifetime gifts and finalized deeds. After you have given a gift or finalized a deed transferring your real property during your lifetime, it is permanent. 

Leaving a Receipt in the Bag: Guidance for Beneficiaries

A comprehensive estate plan is more than just a set of documents; it is a roadmap for your loved ones. It allows you to include clear instructions, guidance, and personal touches that make it easier for them to carry out your wishes with confidence and peace of mind.

  • Personal letters or notes. While letters of instruction are not usually legally binding, they can still be incredibly helpful. Use them to explain your intentions for sentimental items, coveted collections, digital accounts, and other accounts, property, or gifts that may benefit from a little extra context or explanation. 
  • Trustee and executor guidance. Give explicit instructions about how your accounts and property should be managed, especially if they span multiple states or countries, have unique sentimental value, or are intended for a beneficiary with special needs. 
  • Advisory roles. Appoint trusted helpers, such as trust protectors or investment advisors, to support trustees during unexpected situations. Ensure that their roles are well-defined so they do not conflict with other key decision-makers. 
  • Backup plans. Name alternate beneficiaries in case the primary beneficiary is unable to accept their gift.
  • Organized records. Keep accounts, passwords, and important documents organized to make things easier for your loved ones.

Know the Rules: Avoid Estate Plan Faux Pas

Even regifting has its etiquette. And so does estate planning.

You can avoid estate plan faux pas that lead to conflict or unintended outcomes—and the legal and emotional “return lines” that come from unclear, outdated, or inappropriate gifts—by following a few simple rules: 

  • Choose wisely. Think carefully about who is receiving what and whether those gifts fit your beneficiaries’ needs and circumstances.
  • Be discreet. When making updates or sharing instructions, keep things private and well-documented to protect everyone who might be affected.
  • Avoid regifting to the original giver. Anticipate potential conflicts among loved ones or cobeneficiaries and plan contingencies accordingly.
  • Celebrate the intent. Focus on the “why” behind each change or bequest. Gifting with intentionality and meaning reduces the chances that an exchange or regift will be necessary later. 
  • Include a receipt. Leave behind clear letters of instruction, an organized inventory of everything you own, and detailed guidance for trustees and executors.
  • Check the return date. Set up regular reviews to ensure that the “gifts” in your plan still align with current laws, relationships, and life circumstances, and that there is still time to make changes if necessary.

A Gift You Can Give Yourself and Your Loved Ones

Most of us know that regifting comes with rules, and stores have return policies for a reason. Not every gift can be freely swapped. Thoughtful gifting matters. Some things, once given, are final. 

Our favorite gift during the holidays might be the one we give ourselves: an estate plan and the gift of peace of mind that comes with having a well-planned future. However, unlike the casual rules of regifting, the rules of estate planning are written and formal. 

Schedule a time to “unwrap” your plans with us before year-end to ensure that your gifts, as well as your “regifts,” “returns,” and “receipts” reflect both your giving spirit and the law. 

  1. National Re-Gifting Day, Days of the Year (Nov. 6, 2025), https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/re-gifting-day. ↩︎

A Cozy Chat About Your Legacy: Planning for Peace of Mind This Holiday Season

12 Estate Planning Steps to Take This Holiday Season

“On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a partridge in a pear tree.” 

—The Twelve Days of Christmas

A partridge in a pear tree? Lords a-leaping? Many of us may know the lyrics to “The Twelve Days of Christmas,” but few likely know its origin or the meanings behind the song. And what is the story with the 12 days, anyway? Isn’t there just one?

The popular song was inspired by the 12-day liturgical season in Christianity known as Christmastide that runs for 12 nights, from December 25 to January 5.1 It began as a Church tradition and later inspired a period of feasts in medieval and Tudor England, as well as an English folk song.2 The modern version we know was not written until 1909.3

The song may be about symbolic gifts of love and melody, but in estate planning, the most valuable gifts you can give are the ones that bring clarity, protection, and peace of mind—and that last well beyond the holidays.

Keeping in the spirit of the song, consider the following 12 estate planning gifts, each one a practical step you can take to protect your loved ones and plan for your future.

1. A partridge in a pear tree. Female partridges are among a group of clever birds known to feign injury as a way to lure predators from their nest and protect their young. Think of your estate plan as the human version of that instinct—a clever way to protect and reduce risk for your own loved ones.

Estate planning step: Schedule meetings with your financial advisor and estate planning attorney to discuss your priorities, values, and needs. Laying this groundwork ensures that every step that follows serves your core objectives. Be prepared to discuss family dynamics and special circumstances; pinpoint your legal objectives (e.g., minimizing estate taxes or avoiding probate); and determine which financial and estate planning strategies best meet your needs.

2. Two turtle doves. Turtle doves often serve as a symbol of devotion. A comprehensive estate plan that includes everyone you value in your life can demonstrate your own level of commitment to those closest to you.

Estate planning step: Before meeting with your advisor and attorney, gather your personal, financial, and family information, including names, birthdates, and contact information for your children, stepchildren, spouse, siblings, and other loved ones. Consider involving your spouse or your closest family members early in the process. Including them early helps ensure that everyone understands your intentions, avoids misunderstandings, and reduces the risk of surprises or conflict later. 

3. Three French hens. In the famed Christmas carol, the three French hens are commonly associated with the virtues of faith, hope, and generosity. In seeking to safeguard your own nest egg for the next generation, consider what hopes you may have for their future as well as whom you would trust most to carry out your wishes.

Estate planning step: Take time to identify your beneficiaries and understand their individual needs—financial, emotional, or otherwise. Knowing what you want to support in each person’s life helps shape a plan that is both practical and meaningful. But do not stop there; think carefully about whom you trust to carry out your wishes, since the success of your plan depends on choosing the right people to fulfill your intentions when the time comes.

4. Four calling birds. Some historians assert that the song lyrics originally referenced “colly” birds, an archaic term for blackbirds.4 Highly territorial, blackbirds stand ready to defend their home under any circumstances. Once you have a clear picture of what you wish to protect, you will also be able to secure all that you hold dear.

Estate planning step: Prepare an inventory of everything you own and owe, including a complete list of your assets (e.g., accounts and property), income information, and existing insurance policies, as well as your debts. Have this information organized and ready to share at your meetings with your advisor and attorney, ensuring you can effectively defend and protect your loved ones through your estate plan.

5. Five golden rings. According to some researchers, the gold rings from the “Twelve Days of Christmas” song do not signify jewelry but the name of yet another bird, the goldfinch.5 A resilient and adaptable songbird species, the goldfinch reminds you to be prepared to weather any of life’s unpredictable events.

Estate planning step: Preparing for the unexpected means considering many possible scenarios. Your estate plan should be flexible enough to adapt as your life, family, and finances evolve. Before meeting with your advisor or attorney, review any recent life changes, such as births, deaths, marriages, or the acquisition of new assets, and consider how your goals may shift over time. This will enable your plan to be designed to grow and adapt with you.

6. Six geese a-laying. Some pinpoint the six geese in the song as representing creation and new life. Similarly, think of estate planning not as gloomy or morbid but as a forward-looking act of creating new opportunities and protections for those who come after you. 

Estate planning step: An estate plan encompasses more than distributing your money and property after you have passed away. Creating a thoughtful plan that passes your wisdom and values on to your beneficiaries can prove just as meaningful. Think about what family histories, stories, or personal philosophies feel crucial to share with the next generation. You may consider including these in a legacy letter that accompanies your estate plan. Taking this step not only strengthens your legacy but also provides new opportunities and perspectives for the next generation to build upon.

7. Seven swans a-swimming. The number seven is often regarded as sacred in many religions and cultures. In Catholicism, it has often been tied to completeness or perfection. While no one is perfect, you can work with advisors and estate planning professionals to ensure that your estate plan is as complete and legally solid as possible.

Estate planning step: Finalizing and signing your estate planning documents is essential to ensure that they are legally valid and enforceable. Because requirements for witnesses, notarization, and execution vary by state, working with a qualified professional helps ensure that your documents meet all legal standards and reflect best practices in your jurisdiction.

8. Eight maids a-milking. The milkmaid in the lyrics has elicited a range of interpretations throughout history, including portrayals of diligence, humility, and dignity in everyday tasks. At first glance, estate planning may seem to be of interest only to those with significant wealth, but in reality, it is a process from which everyone can benefit, regardless of the size of their estate. 

Estate planning step: Focus on your goals, not just your net worth. Like the milkmaid who found meaning in her everyday work, view your estate plan as a way to care for the people and values that matter most—both during your lifetime and after your death. A well-crafted plan can also guide and protect you during periods of incapacity (being unable to handle your own affairs), ensuring that your daily life and decisions continue to reflect your wishes.

9. Nine ladies dancing. Whether the nine ladies in the song symbolize angels or virtues such as love, joy, and patience remains uncertain. Either way, they serve as a reminder to take the necessary steps in the estate planning process. It may initially seem intimidating or hard to follow, but with guidance from your advisor and attorney, all components of your plan will ultimately align.

Estate planning step: Partner with a professional to master all the right estate planning moves. If you establish a trust-based estate plan, be sure to fund the trust, i.e., transfer assets into it, so it actually works as intended and avoids probate. Another smart move is to keep your beneficiary designations up-to-date, ensuring that your accounts align with the rest of your plan. 

10. Ten lords a-leaping. The leaping lords remind us to lift others up and stay connected during the holidays. Joy grows when it is shared, especially with those who may need extra support or encouragement.

Estate planning step: Taking the lead involves helping those around you. In estate planning, communicate the key elements of your plan to all key partners involved in the process, including your fiduciaries and beneficiaries. Ensure that they are aware of the location of your documents, who is responsible for what, and what you expect from them. By involving your loved ones in the conversation, you provide them with clarity about your wishes and ensure that they are supported when life feels uncertain.

11. Eleven pipers piping. Estate planning can help maintain harmony among your loved ones. You are the composer, and your financial accounts, property, and personal possessions are all instruments that play a role in your plan. A well-structured estate plan that accurately reflects your intentions can facilitate a smooth transfer of assets to your beneficiaries. 

Estate planning step: Once you have completed your carefully curated “playlist” of estate planning documents, store your plan securely (both physically and digitally), and maintain a summary or index that helps your loved ones quickly find what they need.

12. Twelve drummers drumming. Getting into a consistent rhythm as the seasons of your life shift means less stress and more time for celebration and enjoyment.

Estate planning step: Set a regular review schedule—annually or after major life events such as marriage, birth, or a move—to keep your plan current with your life and the law.

The Greatest Gift You Can Give

Knowing where something came from, whether a song, a family tradition, or a personal value, deepens its meaning. The same principle applies to your estate plan.

To create a plan that truly reflects who you are and what you care about, your advisor and attorney need to understand your history, relationships, and goals. It may take longer than 12 days to create your plan once we have all the necessary information, but you will have a gift far more valuable and lasting than anything found under the tree. 

This holiday season, as you reflect on the year and spend time with loved ones, you can take real steps toward securing your family’s future—one meeting, one conversation, and one thoughtful gift at a time. Call us to schedule a time to create or review your existing estate plan.

  1. Catherine Boeckmann, What Are the 12 Days of Christmas? And When does the 12 Days of Christmas start?, Almanac (Nov. 12, 2025), https://www.almanac.com/what-are-12-days-christmas. ↩︎
  2. Id. ↩︎
  3. Meghan Jones, What Are the 12 Days of Christmas, and What Do They Mean?, Reader’s Digest (Sep. 9, 2025), https://www.rd.com/article/where-do-12-days-of-christmas-come-from. ↩︎
  4. Peter Armenti, Is It “Four Calling Birds” or Four Colly Birds”? A “Twelve Days of Christmas” Debate, Library of Congress Blogs (Dec. 21, 2016), https://blogs.loc.gov/catbird/2016/12/is-it-four-calling-birds-or-four-colly-birds-a-twelve-days-of-christmas-debate. ↩︎
  5. Pamela Patton, Five Gold Rings, Princeton University (Dec. 20, 2021), https://ima.princeton.edu/2021/12/20/five-gold-rings. ↩︎

Ask Your Loved Ones What They Want

The holiday season is right around the corner, and you have likely been shopping for the perfect gifts for your loved ones. You may have been wandering through crowded stores, scrolling through online marketplaces, or replaying conversations you have had with your loved ones over the past few months, trying to recall subtle hints they may have given.

What if you just ask them what they want? Wouldn’t you want to know that your gift truly fits rather than guessing? Sometimes a simple question can save you from giving something they do not want or will not use.

Estate planning can be thought of as gift-giving on a bigger, more enduring scale. But unlike a holiday gift that can be returned or exchanged, the “gifts” of an estate plan carry emotional weight and often touch on sensitive family dynamics that demand more in-depth conversation.

When you assume that you know your loved ones’ preferences or avoid the hard conversation altogether, the result is not just disappointment—it is often confusion, conflict, and resentment that can outlast the possessions themselves.

Many Families Have Not Had “the Talk”

Younger generations are increasingly open about sharing what gifts they actually want. This trend can be seen in the growth of online wishlists and digital registries that can help families simplify gifting, avoid awkward situations when someone receives an unwanted gift, reduce waste and “gift anxiety,” and turn gift-giving into a transparent, more personalized experience that strengthens family bonds. 

While digital wishlists like those on Amazon, Giftster, MyRegistry, and Elfster are more popular with younger Americans, they reflect bigger cultural trends around authenticity, intentionality, and transparency. We are now encouraged to be more open and share our whole self in both our personal and professional lives to foster greater trust and connection. 

Unfortunately, however, the trend toward greater openness in gift-giving has not made its way into the estate planning world. According to a 2024 survey, only about a quarter of parents have had generational wealth discussions with their children. 1

This lack of openness has created a growing disconnect between what younger generations expect to inherit and what their parents actually plan to leave. According to a 2025 survey by Northwestern Mutual, there is a growing mismatch between generations regarding inheritance expectations. More than half of younger adults—Gen Z and millennials—say they are relying on financial help or future inheritances from their baby boomer parents. Yet only about one in five boomers plans to leave a significant inheritance.2

Why Communication Matters

Having “the Talk” before “the Transfer” is critical to reducing conflict and uncertainty. And with people living longer, the wealth transfer talk should not be a one-time event; it should be an ongoing conversation as life inevitably evolves.

A few key findings highlight why these conversations matter:

  • Nearly half of younger Americans expecting an inheritance have not discussed it with the person leaving it to them.3
  • Disputes often arise from personal property such as jewelry or heirlooms. Research shows that these personal and often highly sentimental items can cause more fights than money does.4 After all, a retirement account can be divided, but a family heirloom cannot.

This is why it is so important for you to have these discussions with your loved ones while you can. Not only will they be better able to understand your wishes, you will also have an opportunity to learn who values certain personal property items most so you can make thoughtful, intentional choices ahead of time and prevent disputes later.

How to Take the Guesswork Out of Gifts

Open communication about your estate plan is a gift that lasts far beyond the holiday season. If you can simplify holiday shopping with a wishlist, you can simplify estate planning by making your intentions clear and easy for loved ones to follow.

Here is how to put this into action:

  • Use a personal property memorandum. Most states recognize an estate planning tool known as a personal property memorandum. This standalone document lets you specify who will receive specific tangible items you own, such as jewelry, artwork, or collectibles. You can complete this document from the comfort of your home and update it anytime without revising your entire estate plan or meeting with your attorney. By clearly documenting your intentions, you help prevent confusion and conflict among your loved ones.
  • Clarify the role of digital tools. Digital wishlists, shared spreadsheets, and collaborative platforms can help organize personal property preferences and spark family conversations. However, these tools are not legally binding and can even create confusion if they conflict with your signed estate planning documents. To avoid misunderstandings, ensure that any digital lists are consistent with—and ultimately reflected in—a signed and dated personal property memorandum that is incorporated into your will or trust. The value of these lists is in facilitating conversation and organization.
  • Have early and ongoing conversations. Combine legal tools with open dialogue to reduce later misunderstandings and conflicts.

Giving Loved Ones What They Want (and Need)

Guesswork leads to stress, both around the holidays and in estate planning. There is no shame in asking people what they want. Silence about an estate plan can be just as damaging as having no plan. Honesty is not always comfortable, but it can avoid a more unpleasant surprise down the road. 

For guidance on how to turn assumptions into certainty, reach out to us for help.

  1. The Great Wealth Transfer Starts with the Great Wealth Talk, Edward Jones Research Finds, Edward Jones (Feb. 27, 2024), https://www.edwardjones.com/us-en/why-edward-jones/news-media/press-releases/great-wealth-transfer-research. ↩︎
  2. Orianna Rosa Royle, Gen Z Expects to Inherit Money and Assets—but Their Boomer Parents Aren’t Planning on Leaving Anything Behind, Yahoo!finance (Sept. 26, 2025), https://finance.yahoo.com/news/gen-z-expects-inherit-money-145827436.html. ↩︎
  3. New Study Finds America’s Largest Wealth Transfer Faces Unexpected Obstacle: The Family Dinner Table, LegalShield (July 28, 2025), https://www.legalshield.com/press-releases/americas-largest-wealth-transfer-faces-unexpected-obstacle. ↩︎
  4. The Allianz American Legacies Study, AgeWave, https://agewave.com/what-we-do/landmark-research-and-consulting/research-studies/the-allianz-american-legacies-study (last visited Oct. 27, 2025). ↩︎