Category: The Wealth Advisor

12 Estate Planning Steps to Take This Holiday Season

“On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a partridge in a pear tree.” 

—The Twelve Days of Christmas

A partridge in a pear tree? Lords a-leaping? Many of us may know the lyrics to “The Twelve Days of Christmas,” but few likely know its origin or the meanings behind the song. And what is the story with the 12 days, anyway? Isn’t there just one?

The popular song was inspired by the 12-day liturgical season in Christianity known as Christmastide that runs for 12 nights, from December 25 to January 5.¹ It began as a Church tradition and later inspired a period of feasts in medieval and Tudor England, as well as an English folk song.² The modern version we know was not written until 1909.³

The song may be about symbolic gifts of love and melody, but in estate planning, the most valuable gifts you can give are the ones that bring clarity, protection, and peace of mind—and that last well beyond the holidays.

Keeping in the spirit of the song, consider the following 12 estate planning gifts, each one a practical step you can take to protect your loved ones and plan for your future.

1. A partridge in a pear tree. Female partridges are among a group of clever birds known to feign injury as a way to lure predators from their nest and protect their young. Think of your estate plan as the human version of that instinct—a clever way to protect and reduce risk for your own loved ones.

Estate planning step: Schedule meetings with your financial advisor and estate planning attorney to discuss your priorities, values, and needs. Laying this groundwork ensures that every step that follows serves your core objectives. Be prepared to discuss family dynamics and special circumstances; pinpoint your legal objectives (e.g., minimizing estate taxes or avoiding probate); and determine which financial and estate planning strategies best meet your needs.

2. Two turtle doves. Turtle doves often serve as a symbol of devotion. A comprehensive estate plan that includes everyone you value in your life can demonstrate your own level of commitment to those closest to you.

Estate planning step: Before meeting with your advisor and attorney, gather your personal, financial, and family information, including names, birthdates, and contact information for your children, stepchildren, spouse, siblings, and other loved ones. Consider involving your spouse or your closest family members early in the process. Including them early helps ensure that everyone understands your intentions, avoids misunderstandings, and reduces the risk of surprises or conflict later. 

3. Three French hens. In the famed Christmas carol, the three French hens are commonly associated with the virtues of faith, hope, and generosity. In seeking to safeguard your own nest egg for the next generation, consider what hopes you may have for their future as well as whom you would trust most to carry out your wishes.

Estate planning step: Take time to identify your beneficiaries and understand their individual needs—financial, emotional, or otherwise. Knowing what you want to support in each person’s life helps shape a plan that is both practical and meaningful. But do not stop there; think carefully about whom you trust to carry out your wishes, since the success of your plan depends on choosing the right people to fulfill your intentions when the time comes.

4. Four calling birds. Some historians assert that the song lyrics originally referenced “colly” birds, an archaic term for blackbirds.⁴ Highly territorial, blackbirds stand ready to defend their home under any circumstances. Once you have a clear picture of what you wish to protect, you will also be able to secure all that you hold dear.

Estate planning step: Prepare an inventory of everything you own and owe, including a complete list of your assets (e.g., accounts and property), income information, and existing insurance policies, as well as your debts. Have this information organized and ready to share at your meetings with your advisor and attorney, ensuring you can effectively defend and protect your loved ones through your estate plan.

5. Five golden rings. According to some researchers, the gold rings from the “Twelve Days of Christmas” song do not signify jewelry but the name of yet another bird, the goldfinch.⁵ A resilient and adaptable songbird species, the goldfinch reminds you to be prepared to weather any of life’s unpredictable events.

Estate planning step: Preparing for the unexpected means considering many possible scenarios. Your estate plan should be flexible enough to adapt as your life, family, and finances evolve. Before meeting with your advisor or attorney, review any recent life changes, such as births, deaths, marriages, or the acquisition of new assets, and consider how your goals may shift over time. This will enable your plan to be designed to grow and adapt with you.

6. Six geese a-laying. Some pinpoint the six geese in the song as representing creation and new life. Similarly, think of estate planning not as gloomy or morbid but as a forward-looking act of creating new opportunities and protections for those who come after you. 

Estate planning step: An estate plan encompasses more than distributing your money and property after you have passed away. Creating a thoughtful plan that passes your wisdom and values on to your beneficiaries can prove just as meaningful. Think about what family histories, stories, or personal philosophies feel crucial to share with the next generation. You may consider including these in a legacy letter that accompanies your estate plan. Taking this step not only strengthens your legacy but also provides new opportunities and perspectives for the next generation to build upon.

7. Seven swans a-swimming. The number seven is often regarded as sacred in many religions and cultures. In Catholicism, it has often been tied to completeness or perfection. While no one is perfect, you can work with advisors and estate planning professionals to ensure that your estate plan is as complete and legally solid as possible.

Estate planning step: Finalizing and signing your estate planning documents is essential to ensure that they are legally valid and enforceable. Because requirements for witnesses, notarization, and execution vary by state, working with a qualified professional helps ensure that your documents meet all legal standards and reflect best practices in your jurisdiction.

8. Eight maids a-milking. The milkmaid in the lyrics has elicited a range of interpretations throughout history, including portrayals of diligence, humility, and dignity in everyday tasks. At first glance, estate planning may seem to be of interest only to those with significant wealth, but in reality, it is a process from which everyone can benefit, regardless of the size of their estate. 

Estate planning step: Focus on your goals, not just your net worth. Like the milkmaid who found meaning in her everyday work, view your estate plan as a way to care for the people and values that matter most—both during your lifetime and after your death. A well-crafted plan can also guide and protect you during periods of incapacity (being unable to handle your own affairs), ensuring that your daily life and decisions continue to reflect your wishes.

9. Nine ladies dancing. Whether the nine ladies in the song symbolize angels or virtues such as love, joy, and patience remains uncertain. Either way, they serve as a reminder to take the necessary steps in the estate planning process. It may initially seem intimidating or hard to follow, but with guidance from your advisor and attorney, all components of your plan will ultimately align.

Estate planning step: Partner with a professional to master all the right estate planning moves. If you establish a trust-based estate plan, be sure to fund the trust, i.e., transfer assets into it, so it actually works as intended and avoids probate. Another smart move is to keep your beneficiary designations up-to-date, ensuring that your accounts align with the rest of your plan. 

10. Ten lords a-leaping. The leaping lords remind us to lift others up and stay connected during the holidays. Joy grows when it is shared, especially with those who may need extra support or encouragement.

Estate planning step: Taking the lead involves helping those around you. In estate planning, communicate the key elements of your plan to all key partners involved in the process, including your fiduciaries and beneficiaries. Ensure that they are aware of the location of your documents, who is responsible for what, and what you expect from them. By involving your loved ones in the conversation, you provide them with clarity about your wishes and ensure that they are supported when life feels uncertain.

11. Eleven pipers piping. Estate planning can help maintain harmony among your loved ones. You are the composer, and your financial accounts, property, and personal possessions are all instruments that play a role in your plan. A well-structured estate plan that accurately reflects your intentions can facilitate a smooth transfer of assets to your beneficiaries. 

Estate planning step: Once you have completed your carefully curated “playlist” of estate planning documents, store your plan securely (both physically and digitally), and maintain a summary or index that helps your loved ones quickly find what they need.

12. Twelve drummers drumming. Getting into a consistent rhythm as the seasons of your life shift means less stress and more time for celebration and enjoyment.

Estate planning step: Set a regular review schedule—annually or after major life events such as marriage, birth, or a move—to keep your plan current with your life and the law.

The Greatest Gift You Can Give

Knowing where something came from, whether a song, a family tradition, or a personal value, deepens its meaning. The same principle applies to your estate plan.

To create a plan that truly reflects who you are and what you care about, your advisor and attorney need to understand your history, relationships, and goals. It may take longer than 12 days to create your plan once we have all the necessary information, but you will have a gift far more valuable and lasting than anything found under the tree. 

This holiday season, as you reflect on the year and spend time with loved ones, you can take real steps toward securing your family’s future—one meeting, one conversation, and one thoughtful gift at a time. Call us to schedule a time to create or review your existing estate plan.

1. Catherine Boeckmann, What Are the 12 Days of Christmas? And When does the 12 Days of Christmas start?, Almanac (Nov. 12, 2025), https://www.almanac.com/what-are-12-days-christmas. ↩︎
2. Id. ↩︎
3. Meghan Jones, What Are the 12 Days of Christmas, and What Do They Mean?, Reader’s Digest (Sep. 9, 2025), https://www.rd.com/article/where-do-12-days-of-christmas-come-from. ↩︎
4. Peter Armenti, Is It “Four Calling Birds” or Four Colly Birds”? A “Twelve Days of Christmas” Debate, Library of Congress Blogs (Dec. 21, 2016), https://blogs.loc.gov/catbird/2016/12/is-it-four-calling-birds-or-four-colly-birds-a-twelve-days-of-christmas-debate. ↩︎
5. Pamela Patton, Five Gold Rings, Princeton University (Dec. 20, 2021), https://ima.princeton.edu/2021/12/20/five-gold-rings. ↩︎

The holiday season is right around the corner, and you have likely been shopping for the perfect gifts for your loved ones. You may have been wandering through crowded stores, scrolling through online marketplaces, or replaying conversations you have had with your loved ones over the past few months, trying to recall subtle hints they may have given.

What if you just ask them what they want? Wouldn’t you want to know that your gift truly fits rather than guessing? Sometimes a simple question can save you from giving something they do not want or will not use.

Estate planning can be thought of as gift-giving on a bigger, more enduring scale. But unlike a holiday gift that can be returned or exchanged, the “gifts” of an estate plan carry emotional weight and often touch on sensitive family dynamics that demand more in-depth conversation.

When you assume that you know your loved ones’ preferences or avoid the hard conversation altogether, the result is not just disappointment—it is often confusion, conflict, and resentment that can outlast the possessions themselves.

Many Families Have Not Had “the Talk”

Younger generations are increasingly open about sharing what gifts they actually want. This trend can be seen in the growth of online wishlists and digital registries that can help families simplify gifting, avoid awkward situations when someone receives an unwanted gift, reduce waste and “gift anxiety,” and turn gift-giving into a transparent, more personalized experience that strengthens family bonds. 

While digital wishlists like those on Amazon, Giftster, MyRegistry, and Elfster are more popular with younger Americans, they reflect bigger cultural trends around authenticity, intentionality, and transparency. We are now encouraged to be more open and share our whole self in both our personal and professional lives to foster greater trust and connection. 

Unfortunately, however, the trend toward greater openness in gift-giving has not made its way into the estate planning world. According to a 2024 survey, only about a quarter of parents have had generational wealth discussions with their children. ¹

This lack of openness has created a growing disconnect between what younger generations expect to inherit and what their parents actually plan to leave. According to a 2025 survey by Northwestern Mutual, there is a growing mismatch between generations regarding inheritance expectations. More than half of younger adults—Gen Z and millennials—say they are relying on financial help or future inheritances from their baby boomer parents. Yet only about one in five boomers plans to leave a significant inheritance.²

Why Communication Matters

Having “the Talk” before “the Transfer” is critical to reducing conflict and uncertainty. And with people living longer, the wealth transfer talk should not be a one-time event; it should be an ongoing conversation as life inevitably evolves.

A few key findings highlight why these conversations matter:

• Nearly half of younger Americans expecting an inheritance have not discussed it with the person leaving it to them.³
• Disputes often arise from personal property such as jewelry or heirlooms. Research shows that these personal and often highly sentimental items can cause more fights than money does.⁴ After all, a retirement account can be divided, but a family heirloom cannot.

This is why it is so important for you to have these discussions with your loved ones while you can. Not only will they be better able to understand your wishes, you will also have an opportunity to learn who values certain personal property items most so you can make thoughtful, intentional choices ahead of time and prevent disputes later.

How to Take the Guesswork Out of Gifts

Open communication about your estate plan is a gift that lasts far beyond the holiday season. If you can simplify holiday shopping with a wishlist, you can simplify estate planning by making your intentions clear and easy for loved ones to follow.

Here is how to put this into action:

• Use a personal property memorandum. Most states recognize an estate planning tool known as a personal property memorandum. This standalone document lets you specify who will receive specific tangible items you own, such as jewelry, artwork, or collectibles. You can complete this document from the comfort of your home and update it anytime without revising your entire estate plan or meeting with your attorney. By clearly documenting your intentions, you help prevent confusion and conflict among your loved ones.
• Clarify the role of digital tools. Digital wishlists, shared spreadsheets, and collaborative platforms can help organize personal property preferences and spark family conversations. However, these tools are not legally binding and can even create confusion if they conflict with your signed estate planning documents. To avoid misunderstandings, ensure that any digital lists are consistent with—and ultimately reflected in—a signed and dated personal property memorandum that is incorporated into your will or trust. The value of these lists is in facilitating conversation and organization.
• Have early and ongoing conversations. Combine legal tools with open dialogue to reduce later misunderstandings and conflicts.

Giving Loved Ones What They Want (and Need)

Guesswork leads to stress, both around the holidays and in estate planning. There is no shame in asking people what they want. Silence about an estate plan can be just as damaging as having no plan. Honesty is not always comfortable, but it can avoid a more unpleasant surprise down the road. 

For guidance on how to turn assumptions into certainty, reach out to us for help.

1. The Great Wealth Transfer Starts with the Great Wealth Talk, Edward Jones Research Finds, Edward Jones (Feb. 27, 2024), https://www.edwardjones.com/us-en/why-edward-jones/news-media/press-releases/great-wealth-transfer-research. ↩︎
2. Orianna Rosa Royle, Gen Z Expects to Inherit Money and Assets—but Their Boomer Parents Aren’t Planning on Leaving Anything Behind, Yahoo!finance (Sept. 26, 2025), https://finance.yahoo.com/news/gen-z-expects-inherit-money-145827436.html. ↩︎
3. New Study Finds America’s Largest Wealth Transfer Faces Unexpected Obstacle: The Family Dinner Table, LegalShield (July 28, 2025), https://www.legalshield.com/press-releases/americas-largest-wealth-transfer-faces-unexpected-obstacle. ↩︎
4. The Allianz American Legacies Study, AgeWave, https://agewave.com/what-we-do/landmark-research-and-consulting/research-studies/the-allianz-american-legacies-study (last visited Oct. 27, 2025). ↩︎

It is a frigid November night. You put on a sweatshirt and sweatpants to warm up—to no avail—and decide to light the season’s first fire. 

You open the woodstove door to find last year’s ashes still inside, the chimney unswept. Not ideal, but manageable. You can deal with these things later, before winter really gets going. The real problem comes when you head to the woodpile on the porch. The kindling is damp, the logs in short supply. You might get a fire started, but it will take work to keep it going.

A weak fire fizzles out fast. And if you are not careful, your estate plan will too.

Relying on the wrong documents, or ones that have been left untended, can lead you—and your chosen beneficiaries—feeling cold and in the dark. 

Smoke but No Fire: An Estate Plan That Is Not Winter Ready

You cannot stop fall from turning into winter. The best you can do is ensure that you are prepared for colder weather to come.

An estate plan can be thought of in the same way. While it will not stave off what is inevitably coming and what we may prefer to avoid altogether, it can provide warmth to those who are left gathered around the hearth.

For that to happen, the ground must be prepared, the fuel gathered, and the spark ready to strike. Without the right elements chosen ahead of time and ready when needed, a plan, like a fire, can fail to ignite, burn out too quickly, or smolder, giving off smoke but no flame and offering no protection from the cold. 

Here are some practical pointers to keep your estate plan from burning out and to ensure that it is ready to work when you need it most:

• Kindling only supports the fire. Some “logs” do not truly burn on their own: Ethical wills and letters of intent can carry deep meaning and guidance, but they do not always carry legal weight. An ethical will is a personal message or legacy letter used to share values, life lessons, or hopes for future generations, while a letter of intent can provide instructions or context to help loved ones and fiduciaries understand your wishes. These documents act as the sentimental “kindling” of an estate plan: They add warmth and heart. But for a fire that burns long and bright through a winter night, an estate plan also needs a solid, legally enforceable foundation: the big “logs” like wills and trusts.
• Good wood needs proper arrangement. A good fire needs the right setup, as does a good estate plan. If signatures are missing, witnesses are improper, or a document is not notarized when it is required to be, it is like stacking wood the wrong way—the spark never catches. Your estate plan smolders instead of burning; your accounts and property may get stuck in probate, your wishes may go unenforced, and loved ones will likely be left with confusion instead of clarity.
• Tending the flame is essential. Just as you would not build a fire and then leave it, your estate plan should not be a set-it-and-forget-it task. Having an estate plan with outdated beneficiaries or decision-makers is like building a fire with wet logs. Firewood needs to be seasoned, tended, and replenished to keep a steady flame. The same is true for your estate plan; it needs regular review to ensure that it continues to burn bright, that your wishes are current, and that the right people are appointed to the right roles and receive the right inheritance.

Start a Fire—and Keep the Flame Going

When the first chill of the season arrives, we are reminded that a fire represents more than warmth; it symbolizes the enduring flame of family and legacy that your estate plan is meant to protect.

It is not enough to simply get a fire started—or to draft an estate plan once and forget it. Both require care and tending to keep burning bright. Instead of leaving your family in the cold, let’s spark up a conversation. 

Create or Protect Your Family Traditions with an Estate Plan

Thanksgiving is built on a shared story and tradition, but every family has a different way of celebrating the country’s second-favorite holiday.¹ Unlike Christmas and the gift-giving anxiety that can accompany it, Thanksgiving is more about keeping things simple. Sure, hosting has its share of stress, but that stress melts away when the table is set, everyone is seated, and the side dishes are being passed around like the good memories they inspire.

Americans today are somewhat split on what defines a traditional Thanksgiving. Most of us celebrate the holiday, but our traditions and activities vary widely. Some families go around the dinner table and share what they are grateful for. Others give thanks more subtly, with good food, good company, and maybe even a little football and some late-night bargain hunting.

As families—and times—change, so do traditions. Kids grow up, start their own families, and establish their own holiday celebrations. 

Still, as new traditions replace old ones, the core of Thanksgiving—connection, gratitude, and shared experience—remains the same. Estate plans can evolve in much the same way, reflecting new realities and a renewed spirit of giving. Estate plans are not only about passing down money and possessions. They are also a way to preserve traditions, share values, and keep families connected for generations to come.

Incorporating New Traditions into Your Estate Plan

The traditional estate plan can feel a bit like a classic Thanksgiving feast: comforting, but sometimes a bit predictable. It is the same year after year: the same turkey, the same side dishes and desserts, and the same stories told around the table.

While tradition can be comforting and grounding, there is something to be said for mixing things up, not only around the dinner table but also in an estate plan. 

You do not have to settle for leaving your loved ones a one-time, lump-sum inheritance, nor do you have to limit yourself to a standard will- or trust-based plan. Your plan can reflect more modern notions of giving, sharing, and gratitude.

Your estate plan can be shaped around your values and goals and the legacy you want to leave. It may focus on a “gifting while living” strategy,² allowing you to share experiences, generosity, and impact during your lifetime. Or it could be designed to pave the way for future family gatherings and celebrations that continue your traditions and honor your memory after your passing. Many people take a blended approach, combining lifetime gifts with future provisions that bring loved ones together and strengthen their bonds, whether those traditions are tried and true or new and novel. 

But just like serving a creative side dish at Thanksgiving, these strategies work best when they are balanced with practical considerations. Tax considerations, administrative costs, and fairness among your loved ones all need to be baked into the plan. Otherwise, what starts as a heartfelt tradition could lead to heartburn later.

Here are a few ways to build the spirit of Thanksgiving into your estate plan to carry out your legacy:

• Holiday gatherings. Set aside funds in a trust to cover food, decorations, or even rental fees for a larger space so everyone can celebrate the holidays together.
• Family reunions. Direct funds in a trust to pay for a recurring family gathering, such as an annual or biennial event, by either specifying the location and activities in advance or appointing someone you trust to make those decisions.
• Shared travel experiences. Earmark funds in a trust for airfare or gas so no one has to miss Thanksgiving because of cost.
• Keeping the family home or cottage. If your Thanksgiving memories are tied to a specific house or cottage, place the property in a trust or an LLC and set aside funds for upkeep, taxes, and maintenance so that the place that holds your family’s memories can continue to bring everyone together for years to come.
• Charitable traditions. Leave funds that allow your family to continue a tradition of giving by volunteering together or directing annual donations to nonprofits that reflect your shared values.

These strategies can be especially meaningful when thoughtfully designed. Working with an experienced estate planning attorney can help ensure that they are structured in a way that minimizes tax issues and keeps family harmony intact.

Make Time to Gather, Share, and Reflect

Things get busy this time of year. Meeting with an attorney before the holiday rush is a recommended step to review your estate planning strategies and make final adjustments before the calendar year ends.

Whatever traditions you and your loved ones have, estate planning should be part of the mix. In addition to the usual fare—reviewing wills, trusts, and beneficiary designations—consider adding one of the above ideas to the menu this year. 

Traditions and estate plans can become a bit like Thanksgiving leftovers: satisfying but sometimes stale. Trying something new, whether it is a new family tradition or a fresh approach to your estate plan, can bring renewed flavor and joy and create a legacy that reflects who you are and what matters most to you.

If you would like help getting your estate plan recipe just right, please reach out to us.

1. Oana Dumitru, Which Holidays Do Americans Enjoy Most—and Least?, YouGov (Feb. 9, 2024), https://today.yougov.com/society/articles/48626-which-holidays-do-americans-enjoy-most-and-least. ↩︎
2. Brie Williams, Giving While Living: Bridging the Gap in Modern Wealth Transfer, State St. Inv. & Mgmt. (July 9, 2025), https://www.ssga.com/us/en/intermediary/resources/practice-management/giving-while-living-bridging-the-gap-in-modern-wealth-transfer. ↩︎

1. In 2025, what is the total amount of money and property you can gift during your lifetime and leave at your death to your loved ones (other than to your spouse) without owing federal estate tax?
   1. $5 million
   2. $15 million
   3. $13.99 million
   4. as much as you want

The correct answer is “c.” For 2025, the federal exemption is $13.99 million. This amount, also known as the federal lifetime estate and gift tax exemption, applies to both gifts made during a person’s life and accounts and property transferred at death. The exemption is set by federal statute and adjusted annually for inflation. However, any accounts and property left to a surviving spouse who is a US citizen are not subject to federal estate tax due to the unlimited marital deduction.

2. Which of the following estate planning tools is often used to designate who will inherit your money and property after your death?
   1. living will
   2. financial power of attorney
   3. last will and testament
   4. healthcare proxy

The correct answer is “c.” A last will and testament is a legal document that allows the creator of the will, or testator, to specify how and to whom their money and property are to be distributed after their death. It also allows the testator to nominate a guardian for their minor children and appoint an executor to manage their estate.

3. What is the legal process by which a deceased person’s will is proved valid (if they have one) and their estate is administered under court supervision?
   1. conservatorship
   2. trust administration
   3. guardianship
   4. probate

The correct answer is “d.” Probate is the legal process through which a court validates a deceased person’s will (if one exists) and ensures that their estate is properly administered. Probate administration includes paying off the decedent’s valid debts and taxes and distributing the remaining money and property to the beneficiaries. The court oversees this process to protect the interests of all parties involved. 

4. Under a medical power of attorney, a person can appoint an agent to make decisions for them regarding:
   1. business operations
   2. real estate transactions
   3. medical treatment and care
   4. financial investments

The correct answer is “c.” A medical power of attorney—also known as a healthcare proxy or durable power of attorney for healthcare—is a legal document that allows a person to appoint an agent to make medical decisions on their behalf if they become unable to do so themselves. The appointed agent, often a trusted family member or close friend, is authorized to consent to or refuse medical treatments or surgeries and make other healthcare decisions according to the patient’s wishes.

5. What happens if you die without a valid will and own accounts or property in your sole name without a designated beneficiary?
   1. your spouse or children automatically inherit everything
   2. your money and property are distributed according to state intestacy laws
   3. the accounts are held by the financial institution permanently
   4. your money and property automatically go to the state

The correct answer is “b.” If a person dies without a valid will, they are said to have died intestate. In this situation, state intestacy laws determine how the money and property held in the decedent’s sole name, with no designated beneficiary, will be distributed. These laws vary by state but generally prioritize the surviving spouse, children, parents, and other close relatives in a specific order. The state does not automatically seize the money and property.

6. Which of the following assets typically avoid probate?
   1. a solely owned bank account without a named beneficiary
   2. real estate jointly owned as tenants in common
   3. a life insurance policy with a named beneficiary
   4. personal belongings such as furniture and art

The correct answer is “c.” When a life insurance policy has a designated beneficiary, the death benefit is paid directly to that person, bypassing the court-supervised probate process. 

7. The primary purpose of a living will or advance directive is to
   1. name a guardian for minor children
   2. outline medical treatment preferences for times when you cannot communicate those wishes yourself
   3. appoint someone to manage financial affairs
   4. distribute money and property after death

The correct answer is “b.” A living will, also called an advance directive, is a document recognized by most states that provides instructions for a person’s medical care if they become terminally ill or incapacitated and are unable to communicate their wishes. It specifies their preferences regarding life-sustaining treatments such as artificial hydration and feeding, mechanical ventilation, and resuscitation.

8. Which of the following is not a common estate planning goal?
   1. avoiding probate
   2. maximizing income taxes during one’s lifetime
   3. minimizing estate taxes
   4. ensuring money and property are distributed according to one’s wishes

The correct answer is “b.” Common estate planning goals include ensuring that your assets are managed and distributed according to your wishes, avoiding probate, and minimizing estate and gift taxes. 

9. Which of the following can be accomplished by using a revocable living trust as the foundation of your estate plan?
   1. probate avoidance
   2. maintaining privacy during and after your death
   3. providing guidelines and restrictions to protect a beneficiary’s inheritance
   4. all of the above

The correct answer is “d.” A revocable living trust is used as the foundation of most estate plans because it offers several key benefits. It allows the avoidance of probate and ensures that assets are transferred to beneficiaries more smoothly and privately. It also provides guidelines and restrictions that can protect a beneficiary’s inheritance—for example, providing for distributions in stages over time instead of as a single lump sum.

10. Is it okay to leave money or property outright to your loved ones?
    1. no, never
    2. only if they are over the age of 21
    3. only if it is less than $1,000
    4. yes, as long as you have considered the beneficiary’s situation and you have no concerns about their ability to manage money or their need for creditor protection

The correct answer is “d.” Leaving money or property outright to a loved one means giving them full and immediate control. While this is the simplest method of distributing an inheritance, it is not always the best. Before you do so, consider the beneficiary’s specific situation, such as their age, financial maturity, any special needs, and whether they have any creditor issues or concerns.

What comes to mind when you think of the typical American family? 

Today’s families take many different forms: Some are blended through divorce and remarriage while others are built through long-term partnerships, adoption, or fostering. Families may include same-sex or opposite-sex couples; married or unmarried partners; or children from different relationships or no children. Many households also juggle the needs of aging parents or relatives with disabilities. 

You can probably picture many other family arrangements. As today’s modern families evolve and become more diverse, so too must the estate planning strategies that protect them. 

Blended Families

The term stepfamily has largely given way to blended family (or bonus family). However, these terms describe the same thing: a family that forms when partners bring children from previous relationships into a new household, possibly alongside children they have together.¹ And the issues these families face, both in maintaining family harmony and in planning their estate, can be complex, no matter what you call them.

Potential planning goals: Provide for your surviving spouse while also ensuring that your children from a previous relationship receive an inheritance. Some parents in blended families may also want to provide for stepchildren. However, this goal requires purposeful planning because state law does not automatically provide for them.

Strategies: A revocable living trust is often the most effective estate planning tool for parents in blended families. With a trust, you can provide for your surviving spouse for their lifetime—for example, by allowing them to receive income from your trust (and possibly principal as well, under conditions you set)—while still preserving the remaining balance for your children from a prior relationship. This approach helps prevent the unintentional (or intentional) disinheritance that may occur if everything is left outright to your spouse. 

Trusts can also include detailed instructions about how money and property should be used and what happens to any remainder. The key is finding the right balance of fairness and protection within the unique dynamics of a blended family where emotions and relationships may be complex and solutions often require flexibility and nuance.

Unmarried Partners

The number of unmarried couples living together has steadily increased, more than doubling from 3.7 percent in 1996 to 9.1 percent in 2023.² 

Whether couples choose not to marry for personal, financial, or other reasons, the main planning challenge with unmarried partners is that default inheritance laws still favor spouses and blood relatives, despite the uptick in cohabitating partners. 

Potential planning goals: Ensuring that your surviving partner is financially secure; can remain in your shared home (regardless of whether you own it in your sole name or the two of you own it jointly); and has the legal authority to make medical or financial decisions if you become incapacitated. You may also want to provide for children from your current relationship or from prior relationships and avoid disputes with extended family members who stand to inherit from you under state law.

Strategies: Because unmarried partners have no automatic inheritance rights and lack many legal protections from which married couples benefit by default, forward-looking estate planning is a must. You can provide immediate or ongoing support for your partner in a will or a trust, although only a trust avoids the public, and often costly, probate process. Some forms of joint ownership of property or carefully structured beneficiary designations (such as transfer-on-death deeds or beneficiary designations on retirement accounts) can also help ensure that your accounts and property pass directly to your partner when you pass away. 

Advance healthcare directives and financial powers of attorney are also necessary to give your partner decision-making authority in emergencies or while you cannot manage your own affairs. Without such strategies, you and your partner risk being treated as legal strangers, and family members will likely be the ones making financial and medical decisions for you.

Loved Ones with Special Needs

Special needs is a broad term that refers to a variety of situations where a person may require some form of specialized services or support to manage everyday life. 

An individual with special needs may have been born with a physical or cognitive disability, may require a wheelchair due to an accident, or may struggle significantly with depression or anxiety. In some cases, their condition may qualify them for means-tested government benefits, which could be at risk if they were to receive a large inheritance outright. Whatever the situation, careful planning can protect them while still providing support. 

Potential planning goals: Allow your loved one with special needs to receive an inheritance in a way that does not disqualify them from government benefits or put them at financial or personal risk. 

Strategies: A supplemental needs trust can provide financial support without jeopardizing eligibility for programs such as Medicaid or Supplemental Security Income (SSI). This type of trust is designed to limit the beneficiary’s direct access to the inheritance while ensuring that it is used for their needs. A trusted individual that you appoint (the trustee) makes distributions at their discretion.

For those without a functional disability but who otherwise may not do well with receiving a large sum of money all at once—for example, they struggle with money management or substance abuse—an incentive trust can be a helpful tool. This type of trust is not aimed at preserving eligibility for certain government benefits; rather, it allows you to set conditions for inheritance distributions tied to employment, education, sobriety, or other goals and milestones to provide support and protection for the beneficiary. 

Sandwich Generation 

The term sandwich generation refers to adults who support their aging parents and their own children. According to a 2025 AARP research report, about 16 million US adults meet this criterion, and almost one-third of family caregivers in the US have children or grandchildren under age 18 living at home while they also care for an adult family member or friend.³ 

If you are “sandwiched” between these dual demands, your exact situation may vary depending on your age and family circumstances. Your child could be a minor under 18 or a young adult still working on gaining financial independence. Your parents may be entering retirement or well into their 80s or 90s. The different versions of the “sandwich” may carry different balancing acts in terms of time, finances, emotions, and planning strategies. They also require different estate planning considerations.

Potential planning goals: Protect yourself as the caregiver while ensuring that your parents and children are cared for and that there is a seamless transition of decision-making authority, guardianship, and financial support if something happens to you. 

Strategies: If your children are still minors, one key part of your estate plan will be naming a guardian for them if something happens to you. You can make guardianship nominations through a will or a standalone document, depending on state law, so a judge is not choosing a guardian without your guidance or input.

You should also consider including a revocable living trust in your plan. A trust can do more than simply avoid probate; it can ensure that critical financial support for your parents and children continues even if you become incapacitated. After your death, distributions can be structured to provide for minors and young adult children in stages as they grow, while also supporting aging parents who may need assistance but should not have unrestricted access to the funds if they cannot manage their own affairs. Such flexibility allows you to protect everyone you care for in a way that balances their needs with responsible oversight.

There is no such thing as a typical family anymore, and yours is likely no exception. So why should your estate plan be typical? More than ever, estate planning should avoid an out-of-the-box, one-size-fits-all approach and individually and collectively address the unique needs of each family member, now and in the future. If you need to create an estate plan or update an existing one, call us to help ensure that the people you care about are fully protected.

1. blended family, Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries, https://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/us/definition/english/blended-family. ↩︎
2. Change in American Families: Favoring Cohabitation over Marriage, Penn Wharton Budget Model (Feb. 19, 2025), https://budgetmodel.wharton.upenn.edu/issues/2025/2/19/change-in-american-families-favoring-cohabitation-over-marriage. ↩︎
3. Caregiving in the US Research Report at 2, 4, AARP (July 2025), https://www.aarp.org/content/dam/aarp/ppi/topics/ltss/family-caregiving/caregiving-in-us-2025.doi.10.26419-2fppi.00373.001.pdf. ↩︎

We all have those nagging to-do items that never seem to make it to the top of our list, even though we know how important they are. Maybe it is scheduling a checkup with the doctor, calling the HVAC company to inspect that noisy furnace, or starting the fitness routine you keep promising yourself you will implement. Studies show that creating an estate plan is likely one of those tasks on your list. 

An estate plan can seem like an inconvenient or unnecessary task. After all, you are not rich. You do not own an “estate.” You have already filled out beneficiary forms on your main financial accounts and talked to your family about your wishes. What else do you need to do? 

That depends on what you want to accomplish. However, if you have no comprehensive legally documented plan, you must face the fact that you could be giving up the ability to control your legacy. You may also leave your loved ones with uncertainty, conflict, and stress during an already difficult time, and that is the last thing anyone wants to be remembered for. 

Estate Plans Trending the Wrong Way

It can be easy to get caught up in fads that come and go but do not move the needle on our quality of life; think juice cleanses, extreme workout crazes, or the latest productivity hack. However, estate planning is not a fad. 

Although an estate plan is not required by law, having one will truly benefit you and your loved ones during your lifetime and when you pass away. 

Unfortunately, roughly two-thirds of adults have no estate plan in place. A 2025 Caring.com survey found that only 24 percent of Americans have a will.¹ Online service Trust & Will puts the number slightly higher, at 31 percent (with only 11 percent having a trust).² A study from D.A. Davidson found that just one in three adults has any estate planning documents—including a healthcare power of attorney.³ While the exact numbers vary depending on the source, the message is clear: far too many families are unprepared. 

Even more concerning is that the trend is moving in the wrong direction. Fewer Americans are engaging in estate planning today than just a few years ago.⁴ So why do so many people skip this critical step? And how can you avoid falling into the same trap?

Reason 1: “I Do Not Own Enough to Have an Estate Plan”

In all three surveys noted above, the top reason people gave for not having an estate plan was some version of “I do not have enough assets to leave to anyone.”

That misconception tends to stick because the word asset often brings to mind images of wealth: mansions, yachts, or sprawling investment portfolios. However, in reality, an asset is anything you own that has value to you or your loved ones. That may include things with financial value, such as your home, retirement account, or car. It can also mean things with sentimental value, including a treasured family heirloom, your grandmother’s recipe collection, a beloved pet, or even the values and life lessons you want to pass down.

Regardless of your financial situation, you have a legacy you want to leave behind. It is worth asking yourself what that is and how you would like it shared with your loved ones. Estate planning is not only about what you own. It is also about how you see yourself and what matters most to you. It helps tell your life story. 

In addition, most people do not know that estate planning goes far beyond what happens when you die. It is also about what happens if you become incapacitated, whether from illness, injury, or age-related decline. Everyone may face incapacity at some point, and without the right documents in place, decisions about your healthcare, finances, and personal care could end up in the hands of strangers or the courts rather than the people you trust. However, only about one-third of Americans have a healthcare power of attorney, and fewer even know what that is.⁵ Are you one of them? 

This planning gap leaves many families unprepared. An accident, illness, or injury could throw your affairs into disarray and leave your family scrambling for answers that could have been provided ahead of time in your estate plan. 

Reason 2: You Think Beneficiary, Payable-on-Death, and Transfer-on-Death Designations Are Enough

You completed a beneficiary form on your retirement account and set up your investment accounts to automatically transfer to your spouse or child when you pass away. You assume that your spouse will get the house under state law, so there is no need to do any additional planning. You already have an estate plan for your most valuable assets. Nothing more needs to be done. Right?

Some people think they have an estate plan when they have only beneficiary, payable-on-death (POD), or transfer-on-death (TOD) designations that were often filled out years ago and may now be outdated or poorly suited to their current needs and circumstances. 

For starters, beneficiary, POD, and TOD designations generally apply only to certain financial accounts or insurance policies. They typically do not cover property such as a vehicle or a house (unless your state recognizes TOD deeds), and they certainly do not cover anything inside the home, including household belongings, family heirlooms, or collectibles. Without a will or trust, these items may have to go through probate court to be distributed according to state inheritance law, and the recipients may not be people you would have chosen. 

Another limitation is that these designations do not allow you to control when the inheritance is received; it can only be distributed outright. You cannot stagger distributions based on ages, milestones, or a set number of years after your death or create any other personalized plan. Once the inheritance is in the beneficiary’s hands, you lose the ability to protect it from creditors or add guardrails for minor children or adult beneficiaries who may be unwise about managing money.

Finally, beneficiary, TOD, and POD designations work as intended only if they are kept up to date. If you filled out a form years ago and did not update it after a major life event, such as a divorce, a marriage, or the birth of a child, the people you mean to inherit from you could unintentionally be left out. 

Beneficiary, TOD, and POD designations can be valuable tools within a comprehensive, well-thought-out estate plan, but without broader planning and regular updates, they can leave gaping holes. When was the last time you reviewed or updated your beneficiary designations? Have you named backups in case something happens to your initial choices? Are you okay with outright distributions to your chosen beneficiaries that offer them no protections? 

Reason 3: You Told Your Family What You Want to Happen

The discomfort of facing our own mortality can be an underlying reason for not engaging in formal estate planning. You may have already overcome this discomfort and had “the talk” with your loved ones about what you want to happen when you pass away. Because everyone knows your wishes, you may think there is no need to get lawyers or the courts involved; this is a family matter, and everything feels settled.  

The problem is that your verbal conversations with your loved ones—no matter how much they agree—are not legally binding. Openness and communication are important, but putting your wishes into a legally valid estate plan is essential for true protection. Memories fade, stories conflict, and family harmony can break down overnight when money and property are at stake. What began as a peaceful family agreement can quickly unravel into bitter probate court battles.

If you have no legally valid estate plan, the court may need to become involved, and the outcome might look nothing like what you wanted or what your family thought they agreed to. Verbal agreements may feel binding. However, as far as an estate plan goes, spoken promises are worth little more than a pinky swear.

What Motivates You?

There are many reasons why people put off creating an estate plan. But at the end of the day, they are just excuses. As with a leaky faucet or a lingering health symptom, ignoring your estate plan will not make the problem go away. Whether it needs a quick fix or a full build-out from scratch, it is time to stop procrastinating. 

While some people benefit from in-depth conversations about wealth and legacy, many simply need clear guidance on what estate planning covers and why it matters for everyone.

It is up to you to decide the what and the why of your legacy. Once you do that, we can supply the how in the form of a fully documented, legally binding estate plan.

1. Victoria Lurie, 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study, Caring (Sept. 17, 2025), https://www.caring.com/resources/wills-survey. ↩︎
2. 2025 Estate Planning Report, Redefining Legacy, Trust and Will, https://trustandwill.com/documents/2025-estate-planning-report. ↩︎
3. Only One-Third of Americans Have an Estate Plan, D.A. Davidson Survey Finds, D.A. Davidson (Oct. 11, 2022), https://www.dadavidson.com/About-Us/News/ArticleID/5443/Only-One-Third-of-Americans-Have-an-Estate-Plan-D-A-Davidson-Survey-Finds. ↩︎
4. Victoria Lurie, 2025 Wills and Estate Planning Study, Caring (Sept. 17, 2025), https://www.caring.com/resources/wills-survey. ↩︎
5. Only One-Third of Americans Have an Estate Plan, D.A. Davidson Survey Finds, D.A. Davidson (Oct. 11, 2022), https://www.dadavidson.com/About-Us/News/ArticleID/5443/Only-One-Third-of-Americans-Have-an-Estate-Plan-D-A-Davidson-Survey-Finds. ↩︎

Who wants to live to be 100? That depends on who you ask.

Whatever the answer, one thing is clear: The odds of reaching that milestone are rising, along with the length of retirement and the number of life changes that come with it.

Life expectancy gains in the US since the turn of the century are staggering, and they are straining retirement, medical, and support systems that were not designed for such longevity. The number of Americans who are 100 years old or older has nearly tripled over the past three decades and is expected to quadruple over the next 30 years.¹

Though an aging population is a public policy challenge, reaching age 100—and beyond—is also a personal milestone that more Americans than ever are celebrating. While few people plan to live 100 years, more of us will, and your financial and estate plans need to keep pace with that new reality.

Age 100 (and Counting)

Georgia resident Naomi Whitehead became the oldest living American when she turned 114 in September 2024.²

Raised on a farm, Whitehead attributes her long life to hard work.³ Her story is also one of incredible change. She was born in 1910, when the average life expectancy for women was just 52 years.⁴ Only one in eight homes had electricity. Women could not vote, and income tax did not exist. During her lifetime, Whitehead has witnessed two world wars, the Great Depression, the moon landing, airline travel, civil rights milestones, and the digital age. 

Now living in a senior care facility in Pennsylvania, Whitehead may have updated her estate plan a few times along the way, having outlived her husband and three sons.

And because of the trend toward longer life expectancies, the chances of her grandchildren reaching 100 are far higher than hers were. However, those added years are not always healthy years. Early gains in longevity came from decreased rates of infant mortality and improvements in public health; recent increases in life expectancy come from medical advancements that increase the odds of surviving later-life conditions. But today we spend more years managing chronic illnesses such as arthritis, diabetes, and dementia than ever before. We are living longer lives but not healthier ones.⁵ 

You probably already know from experience that your health directly impacts your wealth. The link between health and wealth becomes more important with age. A longer life means more years of expenses, more potential for incapacity, and greater pressure on your retirement and estate plans. Planning around life expectancy and “normal” aging is shortsighted. You also need to plan for longevity risk: the financial, medical, and legal challenges of living longer.

Financial Planning for a Longer Life

Statistically, most of us will not live to be 100, let alone become a supercentenarian (a person who lives to 110 or older) like Naomi Whitehead. However, Americans are expected to continue living longer.

Many people now expect to spend 30 or even 40 years in retirement. Deciding how you will cover living expenses and medical costs, and ensuring that you do not outlive your savings, has become an increasingly important part of financial planning.

The median retirement savings balance for people between ages 55 and 64 is $185,000.⁶ A typical 65-year-old couple can expect to pay more than $680,000 in lifetime medical costs.⁷ This figure represents only out-of-pocket costs, not expenses covered by Medicare. It also does not account for long-term care, which could cost upwards of $100,000 per year, according to an RBC Wealth Management survey.⁸ 

Only slightly more than half of survey respondents told RBC that they have factored the cost of healthcare into their wealth plans.⁹ Of those respondents, half say they are likely underestimating those costs.¹⁰

Estate Planning in the Age of Longevity

Like retirement savings, estate plans are often not built for the long (and getting longer) haul. And that is assuming that you have an existing plan. The number of Americans who do not have an estate plan is double the number of those who do.¹¹ Many who do have one have not updated it in years or decades.

Even if you updated your estate plan around the time you retired, it may now be out of step with your life and legacy goals. Beneficiaries and trustees may have died, family dynamics may have shifted entirely, and new generations—grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and even great-great-grandchildren—may have been born and now need to be considered.

Living longer also increases the odds that something will go wrong, whether medically, financially, or legally, including:

• Cognitive decline or incapacity
• Outdated or missing powers of attorney or healthcare proxies
• Obsolete fiduciary appointments (trustees, executors, agents)
• Conflicting or outdated beneficiary designations
• Misaligned or forgotten asset ownership
• Unintentional disinheritance across multiple generations
• Unsustainable long-term care costs
• Gaps in incapacity or end-of-life planning

A longer life calls for deeper planning—not just to protect your quality of life but also to ensure that your legacy stays intact.

Planning for the Century Mark (and Possibly Beyond)

You might not expect to live to be 100, but planning as if you might is one of the best ways to protect your health, wealth, and family.

Your estate and financial plan should account for the following considerations:

• Rising healthcare costs. Long-term care insurance or hybrid life policies with long-term care riders can help cover care at home, in assisted living, or in nursing facilities.
• Income longevity. Stress-test your retirement plan to ensure that your money will last. Strategies to incorporate into your plan may include guaranteed income sources such as annuities, conservative withdrawal rates, and delayed retirement to boost both retirement and healthcare savings.
• Incapacity planning. Keep durable powers of attorney and healthcare proxies current. Name trusted individuals who are able and willing to act on your behalf if needed.
• Trust-based planning. Trusts can safeguard assets, reduce the risk of conflict, and carry out your goals well beyond your lifetime.
• Ongoing review. Estate plan reviews with an experienced attorney at regular intervals (typically every three to five years, but more often as you age) or when you experience major life changes (such as the death of a loved one, marriage, divorce, inheritance, or significant financial shifts) help ensure that your plan keeps pace with your circumstances, your family, and your long-term vision.

Let’s Talk About the Long View

If you already have an estate plan, now may be the time to review it. Are your documents up to date? Are your chosen decision-makers still ready and able to serve? Have you included everyone you want to benefit?

If you do not yet have a plan, why wait? Living longer does not always mean that you will be able to manage everything yourself. Wisdom may grow with age, but so does the risk of chronic illness and disability. An incapacity plan is just as essential as a will or trust because, by the time you need one, it may be too late to create it.

National Centenarians Day is a reminder that while age tells a longer story, it does not tell the full story. Let us ensure that your plan is built to go the distance—no matter how long that journey may be.

1. Katherine Schaeffer, U.S. Centenarian Population Is Projected to Quadruple Over the Next 30 Years, Pew Rsch. Ctr. (Jan. 9, 2024), https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2024/01/09/us-centenarian-population-is-projected-to-quadruple-over-the-next-30-years. ↩︎
2. Renee Onque, 114-Year-Old Woman in Pennsylvania Is Now the Oldest-Living American: “I’ll Live As Long As the Lord Lets Me,” Makeit (Nov. 6, 2024), https://www.cnbc.com/2024/11/06/114-year-old-woman-in-pennsylvania-is-now-the-oldest-living-american.html. ↩︎
3. Id. ↩︎
4. Aaron O’Neill, Annual Life Expectancy at Birth in the United States, from 1850 to 2023, with Projections Until 2100, Statista (July 31, 2025), https://www.statista.com/statistics/1040079/life-expectancy-united-states-all-time. ↩︎
5. Douglas Broom, We’re Spending More Years in Poor Health Than at Any Point in History. How Can We Change This?, World Econ. F. (Apr. 5, 2022), https://www.weforum.org/stories/2022/04/longer-healthier-lives-everyone. ↩︎
6. Alana Benson, What Is the Average Retirement Savings by Age?, Nerdwallet (Aug. 19, 2025), https://www.nerdwallet.com/article/investing/the-average-retirement-savings-by-age-and-why-you-need-more. ↩︎
7. RBC Wealth Mgmt., Retirement Income Planning: Long-Term Care Considerations 1 (2025), https://docs.rbcwealthmanagement.com/us/4346-retirement-income-planning-long-term-care.pdf (citing Healthview Servs., 2021 Retirement Health Care Costs Data Report, https://hvsfinancial.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/12/2021-Retirement-HC-Costs-Report-op-final.pdf). ↩︎
8. Plan Ahead for Potential Long-Term Care Expenses, RBC Wealth Mgmt. (Oct. 2024), https://www.rbcwealthmanagement.com/en-us/insights/plan-ahead-for-potential-long-term-care-expenses. ↩︎
9. RBC Wealth Mgmt., Taking Control of Health Care in Retirement 5 (2023), https://www.rbcwealthmanagement.com/assets/wp-content/uploads/documents/insights/taking-control-of-health-care-in-retirement.pdf. ↩︎
10. Id. ↩︎
11. D.A. Davidson Survey Finds That Two-Thirds of Americans Do Not Have an Estate Plan, DADavidson, https://www.dadavidson.com/Perspectives-Insights/Perspectives-Insights-Article/ArticleID/1391/D-A-Davidson-Survey-Finds-That-Two-Thirds-of-Americans-Do-Not-Have-an-Estate-Plan (last visited Aug. 26, 2025). ↩︎

Happy National Stepfamily Day to all who celebrate it! Amid shifting family structures, there is a good chance that you are part of a stepfamily—or know somebody who is—which makes September 16 a perfect day to celebrate.

At its heart, National Stepfamily Day is a celebration of second chances and the resilience it takes to embrace the unique challenges of blending families. Those challenges extend beyond trying to get along as “one big happy family” and into financial and legal realms where planning for the future requires as much care and sensitivity as navigating the family relationships themselves.

The Evolution of Stepfamilies

The “traditional” American family—two parents, first and only marriage for both, all children in common—is no longer the dominant household structure and has not been for decades.

With higher divorce rates, increased remarriage rates, and evolving social attitudes, today’s families are increasingly diverse. 

In 2025, an estimated 41 percent of first marriages will end in divorce.¹ As of 2021, more than 2.4 million stepchildren live in US households, according to the US Census Bureau.² 

However, even as the ranks of nontraditional families are expanding, the term stepfamily is falling out of favor. Some say that it carries a stigma and confers second-class status on stepparents and stepsiblings. 

More families have adapted to embrace terms such as blended or bonus families to reflect their unique dynamics in a positive light and foster a sense of inclusion and connection. The law, however, has not evolved as quickly. 

How the Law Treats Stepchildren

You may see no distinction between step- and blood relatives, but the law often does, and that can affect how your estate plan works.

• In most states, stepchildren do not automatically inherit from a stepparent under the default rules (intestacy laws) that decide what happens when someone dies without a valid will or trust. These state laws generally direct your accounts and property to biological or legally adopted children and a surviving spouse. Stepchildren are usually omitted by default.
• Formal legal adoption of a stepchild is typically the only exception. Without it, even decades of parenting a stepchild may carry no legal weight.

Blended families are also vulnerable to unintentional disinheritance. One common scenario occurs when a stepparent leaves assets outright to their surviving spouse, the stepchild’s biological parent. If that spouse later remarries, changes their estate plan, or simply spends down the inheritance, there is no guarantee that your stepchildren, or even your own biological children, will receive what you intended them to have.

Estate Planning Steps for Including (or Excluding) Blended Family Members

Steprelations can present some of the most personally sensitive and legally complicated estate planning conversations. It is important to be clear about whether you want to include stepchildren in your plan, exclude them, or structure inheritances to balance the needs of a surviving spouse, biological children, and stepchildren.

Including Stepchildren

You may want to treat stepchildren as equals to biological children in your estate plan for the following reasons:

• You have developed deep bonds.
• Your stepchildren may have little or no other family support.
• You value fairness or want to avoid divisions and treat all children equally.

Strategies and Tools

If you want to be certain that your stepchildren are included in your legacy, you will need to use particular planning tools to make your wishes legally enforceable. When engaging in proactive planning, remember the following:

• Specific naming and instructions. Use full legal names and clear instructions in your will or trust. Terms such as my children will usually refer only to biological or adopted children.
• Living trusts. A trust can be drafted to specifically name your stepchildren as beneficiaries, ensuring that they receive the share you intend and bypassing default state laws that would otherwise exclude them. With a living trust, you can decide whether your stepchildren receive the same shares as your biological children or different ones and set identical or tailored distribution terms for each.  
• Qualified terminable interest property (QTIP) trusts. Incorporating QTIP trust provisions in your living trust can be a creative way to balance priorities—providing for your surviving spouse’s needs while ensuring that your children and stepchildren ultimately receive their intended share of your estate.
• Beneficiary coordination. Review and update beneficiaries on retirement accounts, life insurance, and payable-on-death (POD) or transfer-on-death (TOD) accounts to achieve the right balance of distributions or integrate a living trust that you have created.
• Lifetime gifts with purpose. Consider giving to stepchildren during your lifetime for milestones, educational goals, or other meaningful needs. This not only supports them in the moment but also reinforces your intent, helping to reduce the likelihood of misunderstandings or disputes after you are gone.

Excluding Stepchildren (or Managing Inheritance Indirectly)

Not every stepfamily is close, and your estate plan does not need to pretend otherwise. You may choose to exclude stepchildren from your estate plan for the following reasons:

• There is emotional distance or past conflict.
• Your stepchildren will inherit from their own biological parent or family.
• You want to preserve your money and property solely for your biological children. 

Strategies and Tools

If you exclude stepchildren from your legacy, it is important to make that intent clear and legally binding. Consider the following when structuring your estate plan:

• Clear and affirmative language. If exclusion is the goal, say so outright in your will or trust. Simply omitting someone from your plan can invite confusion and conflict.
• Living trusts. Use proactive planning tools such as a living trust to limit inheritance to your biological children and descendants while still caring for your spouse. If the goal is to not completely disinherit a stepchild, you could leave them a specific monetary gift or a smaller percentage of the overall estate.
• Guard against the “second spouse” problem. Avoid leaving everything outright to a surviving spouse if your true intent is to benefit your biological children, since your surviving spouse will have no legal obligation to pass along any remaining inheritance to them.
• Keep up with change. Regularly update documents and beneficiary designations after major life events such as remarriage, estrangement, or reconciliation to take into account new family dynamics and changing wishes.
• Prenuptial and postnuptial agreements. If your current marriage is a subsequent one, these agreements can specify how assets will be divided at your death, protecting children from prior relationships and preventing unintended disinheritances.

The Next Step: Talk to an Estate Planning Attorney

Blended families bring added complexity, and with it, more opportunities for miscommunication or disputes. Unequal treatment of biological children and stepchildren can create tension or resentment, especially when estate plans are vague, outdated, or unclear.

Keeping your plan current and talking openly with your family can help reduce conflict and ensure that your legacy is passed on the way you intend. However, these conversations can be highly emotional and nuanced. There may be thoughts you hesitate to say out loud, such as “They are not really my kids,” “My spouse will take care of them,” or “We want to treat everyone equally.”

We can help you create an estate plan that reflects your intentions—whatever they may be. Anything you tell your attorney will be kept confidential, and any estate plan documents you create can be kept private until they are needed. 

Let’s take the next step and talk about how to build a plan that honors the full picture of your family and legacy.

1. Robert McAllister, Divorce Rates in US 2025 – Current Trends and Analysis, NCH Stats (Dec. 11, 2024), https://nchstats.com/divorce-rates-in-us. ↩︎
2. National Stepfamily Day: September 16, 2023, U.S. Census Bureau (Sept. 16, 2023), https://www.census.gov/newsroom/stories/stepfamily-day.html. ↩︎

Bookending the first week of September with Labor Day is a less recognized holiday that may not get much national attention but should if you are planning for your future: National 401(k) Day.

Though we are in an era of overall declining economic confidence, many Americans are still somewhat upbeat about their retirement savings. However, how you feel about your 401(k) account may not reflect what is actually in it. National 401(k) Day is an ideal opportunity to take stock and ensure that your plans keep pace with your expectations—for both yourself and your loved ones.

The State of the 401(k) in 2025

The 401(k) has become one of the most essential tools for building and transferring wealth in America.

As a product of late 20th-century tax policy that shifted the responsibility for retirement savings from employers to individuals, today roughly 6 out of 10 Americans say that they have a 401(k) or similar employer-sponsored defined contribution plan. In 2025,¹ the average 401(k) balance for Americans across all age groups is $315,820, but that number varies widely.²

Vanguard data shows that people earning $75,000–$99,999 annually have a median balance of $53,112 in retirement savings—nearly double the median for those earning $50,000–$74,999 ($27,528).³ Age matters too: Empower reports that workers in their 40s tend to have more than twice the savings of workers in their 30s ($158,093 versus $77,546, respectively),⁴ underscoring the power of compounding growth and the importance of saving early and consistently. 

Why Long-Term Planning Is So Hard—and So Important 

If you have struggled to prioritize long-term savings or estate planning, you are not alone, and it is not simply a discipline issue. Poor planning is inherently human. Well, sort of. 

A major reason that many people find it difficult to plan for the future is that we are just wired that way.⁵ We have all sorts of cognitive biases that reward short-term wins over long-term gains. The further away the goal, the more abstract—and harder to act on—it becomes. 

Experts call this the “time horizon problem,”⁶ and it helps explain why estate planning lags even further behind than retirement saving. About twice as many Americans have a retirement account (6 in 10)⁷ as have an estate plan (1 in 3).⁸

And while retirement savings concepts, such as tax-deferred growth, employer contributions, and spending goals, may feel familiar and straightforward, estate planning can seem daunting, time-consuming, and filled with legal jargon. 

Passing on Your 401(k): Directly or Through a Trust?

For most people, a retirement account and their primary residence are among the most valuable assets they will ever own.⁹ However, the rules for passing them on to loved ones are very different.

You may have named a beneficiary when you first opened your 401(k) account, but is that designation still what you want? If your life has changed since then (think marriage, divorce, birth of children, estrangement, etc.), your current beneficiary form may no longer reflect your wishes. In addition, leaving the account outright by beneficiary designation to that person may not be the most secure or protective way to pass on an inheritance. 

If your 401(k) passes directly to a beneficiary, that person receives full access to and control over the account immediately and with no restrictions. That may be fine for a financially responsible adult or spouse with no creditor concerns or divorce risk, but what if your beneficiary is a minor, has special needs, or is irresponsible with money?

Instead of naming individuals directly as beneficiaries of a retirement account, you can protect your loved ones by naming a revocable living trust as the beneficiary in your estate plan. Not just any living trust will do; there are specific things to consider when using trusts for retirement planning so your beneficiaries remain protected.

Conduit and Accumulation Trusts for 401(k)s

If you designate a trust (such as a revocable living trust or a standalone retirement trust) as the beneficiary of your retirement account but the trust does not meet certain Internal Revenue Service (IRS) rules, the entire account usually has to be paid out within five years—which often means a bigger income tax bill. A trust that does follow the IRS rules is called a see-through trust. This type of trust allows the IRS to “see through” the trust and treat the trust’s beneficiaries as if they were named directly as beneficiaries of the retirement account. This type of trust often results in a 10-year payout term, which often means a smaller income tax bill. For this reason, if you plan to name a trust as your retirement account’s beneficiary, it is crucial that you work with an experienced attorney who will ensure that the trust qualifies as a see-through trust.

Once you know you have a see-through trust, the next key decision is whether it will be structured as a conduit trust or an accumulation trust, each of which handles retirement account distributions differently. 

Conduit Trust: The Pass-Through Option

You may find that a conduit trust best aligns with your goals and your beneficiaries’ needs. Here are some of the main features of a conduit trust: 

• The withdrawals that your trustee takes from your 401(k) must be distributed to the trust beneficiaries within the same calendar year.
• Distributed funds are taxed at the beneficiary’s personal income tax rate.
• Once distributed, the funds are no longer protected by the trust—meaning less control and limited protection from the beneficiaries’ creditors.
• Under the Setting Every Community Up for Retirement Enhancement (SECURE) Act, most nonspouse beneficiaries must withdraw all the funds from the account within 10 years. While this requirement could create a large taxable lump sum in year 10, a conduit trust allows the trustee to choose when to take the withdrawals instead of leaving the decision in the hands of the beneficiary, enabling distributions to be spread over the 10-year period while potentially reducing the tax impact. 

Accumulation Trust: The Discretionary Option

If you do not want retirement account withdrawals to be immediately distributed to your trust beneficiaries, you may find that an accumulation trust best aligns with your goals and your beneficiaries’ needs. Here are some of the main features of an accumulation trust: 

• The trustee must withdraw all funds from the retirement account within 10 years, but in contrast to a conduit trust, is not required to distribute them to trust beneficiaries right away; rather, they can choose to retain the funds in the trust.
• Retirement account withdrawals that remain in the trust beyond the calendar year in which they are taken are taxed at the trust’s compressed income tax rates; if funds are distributed during that year, the beneficiary pays income taxes at their personal rate.
• Funds retained in the trust remain protected from creditors, lawsuits, or reckless spending, which may align with your overall estate planning goals. 
• The trustee can spread withdrawals over the 10-year period to better manage taxes and preserve the inheritance without being required to immediately pass those withdrawals to the beneficiary. Such flexibility can make accumulation trusts a better choice for minor children, beneficiaries with poor financial habits (spendthrifts), or beneficiaries with special needs. 

Take Some Time to Reflect on (and Look Ahead to) National 401(k) Day 

National 401(k) Day may not bring fireworks or parades, but as Labor Day festivities wind down and summer fades into fall, it is a day worthy of pause and reflection. 

While you are out with your family enjoying summer’s final days, remind yourself of the hard work and sacrifices that have brought you to this place. You may be still contributing money into a 401(k) or finally enjoying its fruits. Either way, you want it to last as long as possible. You and your family may be enjoying good times now, but what about 10, 20, or even 50 years down the line? 

The trust structure you choose today can help ensure that your 401(k) not only supports your own future but also protects and provides for your heirs after you are gone. However, trust-based 401(k) planning is not as simple as filling out a beneficiary form. An attorney can help you avoid earlier-than-expected distributions, unnecessary tax bills, and missed opportunities for protection. 

Time may not actually be moving faster, but you do not have forever to work on your estate plan. To discuss all your planning options for a 401(k) and your other accounts and property, schedule a time to talk.

1. What Percentage of Americans Have a Retirement Savings Account?, Gallup (June 2, 2025), https://news.gallup.com/poll/691202/percentage-americans-retirement-savings-account.aspx. ↩︎
2. Paul Deer, The Average 401(k) Balance by Age, Empower: The Currency (July 15, 2025), https://www.empower.com/the-currency/life/average-401k-balance-age. ↩︎
3. Vanguard, How America Saves 2025, at 51 (June 2025), https://institutional.vanguard.com/content/dam/inst/iig-transformation/insights/pdf/2025/has/2025_How_America_Saves.pdf. ↩︎
4. Deer, supra note 2. ↩︎
5. George Michelsen Foy, Humans Can’t Plan Long-Term, and Here’s Why, Psych. Today (May 12, 2025), https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/shut-up-and-listen/201806/humans-cant-plan-long-term-and-heres-why. ↩︎
6. Brad McMillan, The Time Horizon Problem, Commonwealth (Sept. 16, 2016), https://blog.commonwealth.com/independent-market-observer/the-time-horizon-problem. ↩︎
7. Gallup, supra note 1. ↩︎
8. D.A. Davidson Survey Finds That Two-Thirds of Americans Do Not Have an Estate Plan, DADavidson, https://www.dadavidson.com/Perspectives-Insights/Perspectives-Insights-Article/ArticleID/1391/D-A-Davidson-Survey-Finds-That-Two-Thirds-of-Americans-Do-Not-Have-an-Estate-Plan (last visited Aug. 26, 2025). ↩︎
9. Rakesh Kochhar & Mohamad Moslimani, 4. The Assets Households Own and the Debts They Carry, Pew Rsch. Ctr. (Dec. 4, 2023), https://www.pewresearch.org/2023/12/04/the-assets-households-own-and-the-debts-they-carry. ↩︎